God blessed!

Today received call from Aunt saying that Ah Yeh is not in good shape, cannot control urination and excretion. We got so shocked and rushed down to see Ah Yeh immediately...his health is obviously not in pink shape. Declining day by day...haiz. For a 102 years old veteran like him, we have to be prepared all the while since this is not the first time already. Mum has to wash his body and so summore lol. But he got better after swallowing some oat meal and now can even fix the toilet door. Phew! What a day...I was driving the whole day since daddy was in good mood and never grumble single bit about my kaputed driving skill :s

Went Kerry's for a while to buy book, The Time Traveller's Wife, an old book but heard that it's nice and that's it haha used to borrow from Kei last year but never lay my hands on it once also. On top of that have to buy watercolour for next week's assignment and bought one sketching pencil...and lotsa odd stuffs. Later, went to Padini and 38 with Terence, since he's going to Aus soon also, smelly Hazree is here but no time to meet up with him. Cheryll will be leaving on 8th Aug to Arizona, one by one leaving~left me in JB T^T.

Cheryll should be watching Christina live in Singapore right now, damn!!! Complimentary ticket sial! I'm so not gonna through with it! Who wants to go Gwen Stefani's concert? It seems everyone wants to "han lui" T^T

PS : JJ Lin's new psycho MV damn kick ass but unfortunately couldn't get thru the cencorship haiz....but still can catch it at Kara. box around ^^v

*****

It's been a while my long lost bittersweet dark choco series~

One of the many grandfather's clocks owned by Ah Yeh (my grandfather in 102)

Cover of US's Chinese tabloid...O.o

Old-skool workshop in Bentong, Uncle's hometown

Bougainvillea

Me and the bauhinia at Lantau Island=.="

~~~~~

“The dreamer dies, but never dies the dream,
Though Death shall call the whirlwind to his aid, Enlist men's passions, trick
their hearts with hate, Still shall the Vision live! Say nevermore, That dreams
are fragile things”

Safer now?

Saw quite a few police cars doing occasional patrolling around my neighbourhood does it means that we are SAFER now? No more lap lap luen? I've no idea about those police's attitudes and efficiency but somehow just a few more cars patrolling really doesn't mean anything since CAR itself cannot really counter small crimes like burglary that effective...the best is still a motorbike or better yet like the one in Putrajaya, horse patrolling team! Snatch thieves surely gonna be in big doom if they encounter this haha. Horse over their dead bodies! Anyways, the rukuntetangga in my neighbourhood actually hired a few watch guards at night but I doubt their ability also since the crime rates around my neighbourhood still seems like static and we actually pay them...so the best is still GGC aka Gated Guarded Community. Hope they will isolate this compound with

fencing soon without facing obstacles from MBJB.

Next week Process-Procedure group assignment is in total miserable mode now, it's gonna be on Tuesday and everyone is so laid back and ignorant about it. Member 1 giving the excuse of having to settle his divine Uni. application in this tight 1 week. Fine! Member 2, asked him for suggestion he didn't turn down but rather giving me the weak excuse of wanted to study for Econs test or shits and will catch me up later. Fine! Member 3, involving in English Day emcee-ing and English Debate thingy obviously can't be bothered much about this puny stuffs. Almost everyone I asked are clueless about what to do. It's ok, fine for me, I swear with your mother's lives. Now a big gracious thanks to all because I'm gonna do it on my own already. I've suggested this tie-dye with watercolour shits. They told me since it's MY suggestion they will all abide to it and I actually have to try out experimenting it before bringing it to the presentation rite? Fine! But once I told them I might not be able to do it successfully because it's my first time doing it also. Upon this reply, I've received the most creative head-bang-wall-puppy-dies answer, THEN I DON'T KNOW. 666. Fine again! 10 marks down the drain is ok for me since I'm not applying to any Ivy League heaven-weep-hell-scream Universities also. GPA or CGPA cukup makan sudah! So what more should I concern then? If I hadn't been back here in JB now, I think I would have to go all the way out to buy materials instead of you buggers that having cars, families and shits around! I hate clueless people, the only circumstance that I will say "I DON'T KNOW" is when I'm really thirst with suggestions DESPERATELY. Why can't they be more proactive at least in terms of giving suggestions and not just wandering around SMS to each everyone asking their suggestions, think one for yourself before you go on asking my dear! Now that the group assigment has yet to become a solitaire work...even if I'm having numerous replacement classes next week and Chemistry test II, I won't bother to grumble a single word, although ENL 101 credit is non-transferable but still it's an assignment, in fact a GROUP one to be more precise. So wanna be passengers or real contributors all up to you all. I've had enough of all my bitchings since last group assigment. Call me hypocrite, call me masked man, double faced as you wish. Alright, my reaction is tad too strong I guess but one thing if you think I care, I DON'T!

I'm going to bookstore today and buy up all the Stephen King's sci-fis and read them up and fucking care much for that piece of assignment. There you go, I shall dismiss all of you now. *roll eyes and walk off*

Seriously, if you don't wanna acknowledge my presence and effort. There will be no point I'm doing that all the OMS like a fool right? I've always being proactive to help out people but the reciprocity is often not equal. I'll also need someone to help me out when I'm having problems and downs but in fact no one's really there for me. It seems like...forget it since I'm so not worth! I don't wanna get myself involved in emo wave again please.

PS : I'm gonna find a tutor for Calculus II soon! Lest I'll just die horribly without legs...

PPS : Spice Girls are coming right back at ya'!

****

Now, get yourself a piece of mind, won't you?

More rasuah = more efficient lor...correct ah?

~~~~~

"Teamwork is the ability to work together
toward
a common vision. The ability to direct individual accomplishments
toward
organizational objectives. It is the fuel that allows common people
to
attain uncommon results."

Home

Just got back home after 5 hours of bus ride...

Feeling drowsy, head turned 500 kg but still insist of blogging something I encountered during my journey ^^v.

I was sitting beside this Indian girl which is 1 year younger than me to say, managed to chat with her through out the journey. Actually she started to talk to me first but I learned that she's a nursing student afterall, so no harm going on with the conversation.

Well, she came from a financially uptight family where her father passed away few years ago in Ipoh I supposed, she's from Perak by the way. So she got her loan from PTPTN to pursue her studies for Nursing in Masterskill. During the talking, I came across that she is very passionate towards her job eventhough her parents just want her to get married off as soon as possible. But then, she even intend to further to degree level for Nursing. She went all ambitious and passionate about her current internship.

Having to major in Allied Health Science, yea I mean moi!!!! It's such a great shame that I technically didn't really understand half of her talking. I don't own such great passion as compared to her eventhough I would love to tell people that what I'm majoring in but I can't go any further about that since my degree of passion is unabashedly far lesser. I do having a little haemophobia as well when she was telling me how wonderful when her lecturer show them the real human's body parts in class and being able to squeeze and feel them......lol. Gah!

It's pointless, I guess I should strengthen what I'm doing now first and foremost before I can go on any further. At least, fix up Chemistry and Calculus II...the rest can talk later bah!Haha.Bummer Bummer Bummer.

How to cultivate interest in health care profession? Aiyo, someone please give me guidance T^T I love lab and stuffs that's about all -_-

*****

Old whoring pic taken from Cheryl's room back then on the 26th floor penthouse unit of SMCH!Damn cun!And look at my nails also courtesy of her...my emo/punk rock companion.

***

“Life is not a journey to the grave with
intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to
skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming
... WOW! What a ride!”

STML I think....

Deadliest Calculus II quiz ever for today, you think 2 questions are peasy when you can practically(yes practically handed in a piece of blank paper!) blanked out and clueless when there were just ONLY 2 questions. Formulae booklet was not even provided on this occasion.*roll eyes to max*

1) Trigonometry integrals
2) Trigonometry substitutions

The common factor, [trigonometry].
.
.
.
.
.
Yes, I never liked trigonometry integration and any other things to do with it in my life. I SO CAN'T THROUGH WITH IT!


Bumped into Ben just now, and grabbed a bite in BK...on top of skipping gym, this is what I've been doing most while, eating fast foods and fattening stuffs 666.

Really traumatised by Calculus II, what if I fail? I guess worst case scenario will be repeating. And then that will be total disastrous and wonderfully wonderful nightmarrrrrrrrrrrrrree!

***



Silent Hill's comic!(Among the Damned)




Those are my fingers that doing all the wonders!
Nope, I'm not trying to be lovey-dovey but just happened to get amazed by the inner potential of fingers. Little things that you seem to overlook daily can actually comprise a big wonder when you least aware of them, I believe everyone has their upsides and inner abilities cloaked somewhere beneath the innermost of them yet to be unveiled. So if we are not the wonders, who else?





"the hottest love has the coldest end, deep but meaningless..."


PS : will be back in JB over weekend, need to catch some fresh air lest I'll get suffocated and I really wanna CEKIK this blogger, damn mofo buggy!

Into a deep deep abyss

As usual, ENL 101 class we did some art works to the so called visual presentation (state of the art, mind you!). Brought along my long lost magic pens, did some silly scrabbling on mahjong paper and there it goes our presentation for the lesson, a futile one! It's like creative and motivated teachings la since we had NIE lessons every now and then but I seriously need to improve my grammatical skill, if not more.

ANT 101's mid term test was ok only, I won't say that I've had enough complacency to excel this paper. Just hope I won't screw it up nicely since I did like 9 definitions (supposed to choose 5 out of 9 but I did all XD ) and 2 equal weightage essays about social stratification. Damn, where does my spirit of those days went? I used to write 2 pages full of essay(around 1k of words) in 30 minutes and that's a norm for all the Law papers I supposed. The good ol'me is now slumping...I hate writing now! Just feel like avoiding it for all I can when it comes to any form of writing.

MAT 133 still the same miserable one. Actually why did I take CAL II? It's engineering maths c'mon. Just like what my friends are learning in part of their engineering course modules. I'm more of a Statistics person and I love Stats. Miss ma' S1 and S2...hypothesis testing, CI, Continuous Random Variable and shits. What the fuck is L'hopitals rule, inverse trigo, hyperbolic trigo, inverse hyperbolic trigo...? Do I even need them to complete Clinical Lab. Science? *punches chest* Just can't figure out and I supposed ICSJ will ask me to take it as it is, don't question. My transferring Uni does not even require me of any Calculus papers. Bummer rite? I super detest trigonometry! It's the worse thing comes after Vector. Tomorrow got quiz on 8.4 and 8.5, I shall die very soon.

I got super not time for CHM 151 nowadays, being my fav. subject of all. I feel so sorry for it! Next Wed. is my test 2 already...gotta hit it off during the weekend or so.

Hope I can stem the tide and survive through the deep abyss!


PS : Gwen Stefani's concert ticket pricings has already out, RM 382, RM 362 ,RM 282, RM 172 and RM 122 (exclude RM 3 processing fee). People, you can book from 14/7 onwards at Axcess box office or office, Hardrock Cafe, Planet Hollywood and Rock Corner at MV. 10% off for Maxis Hotlink and Maxis One Club customers summore. So, anyone? It's at Bkt Jalil indoor stadium.I'M PRAYING FOR MY FINAL EXAM DATE WON'T BE CLASHING WITH IT!

*****

The Kalahari tribesman in Botswana, Africa (one of the many tribes we get to learn in ANT 101, how fantastic rite?)

Sadako revisited. She's gonna skin me alive if she saw this.

*****

“You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity.”

Old besties gathering

After finished my Chemistry class today, off I went to Pyramid courtesy of Khim May's car.

Jerry and Jonathan were there long before we reached and had lunch in Pizza Hut (grossed out!haha) and saw this cocky lady in Jubah, Arabians I supposed being rude and showing off his ability to speak English when confronting with waiters who can't! Felt like wanna bitchslap her in school of manner and pump 50 kg of parmesan cheese into her mouth to shut her up. Surprisingly, Dashni came with her new found bf, a kickboxing instructure. Cool guy to say the least! Polite and well mannered, definitely not the typical Indian. Oppsie, no offence!


While waiting in front of the cinema, I was so surprised to see Danial and Hazree came along too! It's been ages since we last met during some clubbing occasion I think haha!




Anyways, they watched Ocean 13 whilst me, KM, Jeremiah and Jonathan sticked to Surf's Up. Again, animation to do with penguins after Happy Feet. Kinda amusing but short and dry on top of that.


Azrul joined me and KM after they all left...and we just sit in Mantra and talk talk talk gossip gossip gossip about those Good ol'days!




Well, I have to off for Anthro book, tomorrow is the fucking midterm!


PS : Changed my templates to this neat layout and customised one. Abandoned the previous one.

PPS : Gwen Stefani will be stopping by KL for her world tour concert! Scheduled on Aug. 21st at Bkt. Jalil Stadium I think. Anyone?






***








Lagoon *day* - the place whom I hated but not anymore





Lagoon *night* - I saw my former room somewhere in the pixels!





Resort & Spa Hotel Lobby





One of the many chandeliers





Mantra's menu -_-





Some Northern Indian "chap fan" with exorbitant price





KM and me





KM, me and Azrul...looks geeky and formal sial?








LTR : John,me,KM,Hazree,Dashni,Danial







***





There cannot live an unhappier creature than an ill-natured old man, who is neither capable of receiving pleasures, nor sensible of conferring them on others.






"Art is the human disposition of sensible or intelligible matter for an esthetic end. "

BLOGGER PRETTY SUCKS!

LOL

I did some modifications on myself for the templates and who knows it dies on me. My page layout is in a mess now and it came to a point of no return.

I shall seek for a new template in real soon.

Still, no comments, tag box and so on so forth allowed.

Talk show parody and happiness

Alright, the whole ANT 101 class were kena lessoned nicely by Ms. Lim. According to her, our tutorial essay's answers are not up to the quality yet. She solemised the class atmosphere. Well nonetheless, ENL 101 today saved my day! I've experienced the single most hilarious lesson in ENL 101 or better say in ICSJ thus far. Again we were being assigned into groups where we will be given a task that required us to do up an off-air talk show in class. It can't be any funnier than this, my usual group was splitted and we were compelled to join other groups that we hardly hang out with. Goodness gracious I was in Melvin and Co.'s group which I didn't really like it but somehow it just turned out fine. Jasmine and Melvin both agreed that I have the potential gigolo's look -_-.And so our talk show topic was pertaining to prostitution, what else but the gigolo was me since they claimed that I have a sexy piercing on my cartilage. Is that even related? I shall not digress lol.

Anyways, we were the last group to do presentation and through out the whole lesson I was terribly roll-on-the-floor laughing like no one's business. Those peoples were just too creative and they came out with interviewing session with superheroes, pornstars, smokers...so crappy until Ms Kalai couldn't help but to tell us that she might just lose her job in a day due to our explicit topics. She wanted us to be like Oprah Winfrey, Ellen Degeneris, Tyra Bank, David Letterman but hell the effects were almost beyond laughable!

As for my group, I was forced to pretend that I'm having lotsa piercings on private parts and specialised in rich tai-tais hooking(damn gross)...so totally not me! Yang was the transsexual and he did a great job with all the namby-pamby body language and gimmicks, I can do better I guess :p.MK was the "pat gu" prostitute from China whereas Jasmine was the materialistic whore cum bling bling worshipping pros. who desires for infinity. Melvin was the emcee cos I didn't wanna talk since I'll most probably chunk out a lengthy impediment speech. And we got compliment from Ms Kalai! Haha, it's like unexpected and lame. My marks for ENL 101 assignment 3 weren't that good since it's a pair work and the time frame given was limited to the scheduled class hours. Bugged her for a kesian mark though haha...since she was in good mood today!

Guess nothing else much for today...my normal days are pretty boring and alone usually but still I need to be contented somehow if not I'll breakdown and getting emo again.

*****
Collage



Robotic routine of me : repetitively, college > home > gym > home > homeworks > sleep

My hands are full of blisters all thanks to the rowing machine that boost muscles on biceps.

Alas, bills bills bills! T^T

Glistening mirrorballs and chandeliers at The Loft.

*****

He slumped. He cheered. Momentary happiness. Breakdown. They wept. "Out. Leave me alone."

and so....

Whoever is happy will make others happy, too.

~~~

"For everything there is a season,
And a time for every matter under heaven:
A time to be born, and a time to die;
A time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
A time to kill, and a time to heal;
A time to break down, and a time to build up;
A time to weep, and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn, and a time to dance;
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
A time to embrace, And a time to refrain from embracing;
A time to seek, and a time to lose;
A time to keep, and a time to throw away;
A time to tear, and a time to sew;
A time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
A time to love, and a time to hate,
A time for war, and a time for peace."

Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

This is a happy entry

Haven't been going to the gym for like few days already!And all I'm doing here is eating eating eating and still eating...gosh...my stomach is really bottomless now.Weight inclined at the same time T^T.

Anthro mid term this thursday is miserable, it's hard to comprehend all the food getting and economy system of those aboragines.Calculus is in new topic already and one more topic left to sum up the whole MAT 133...how instant and it seems like I've not been absorbing much from that also.Sad case!I'm all ready to retake MAT 133 since I left out a lot in MAT 132 which I didn't learn in A-level Pure Maths.Regret...

Anyways,went to OU today for the first time of the year I guess(since my OU kaki Steph. is not here this time around).Reached there pretty late and straight away hunted for food,nothing else(Shogun was jampacked with heads by that time and having an intolerant stomach certainly wouldn't allow me to wait any longer T^T).After dinner,what else's the best but to crave for dessert.One word,INDULGENCE and love it very much!Life can never be nicer than this XD...I am gonna gobble up the whole universe soon!

*****


Gloomy weather, I foresee a downpour...

Indeed -_-

PBD

Mediocre food at BBQ Plaza

Refraction

Herrrooow~your friendly foodie kaki on spree

Baked Apple Tart @ Bakerzinnnnnn, it tasted 1000 times better than its appearance.

Now you see it and now you don't.

Purity under the twilight

*****

I got so super potong-steamed cos strawberry shortcake being their creme de la creme bakery was sold out AGAIN :( other than that were either less appealing to my taste bud or darn fattening.

Thanks to certain someone who has been accompanying me along for food and all the gabbings.You know who you are la although you nearly got me jeopardised today! I never regret of knowing you for so many years and time flies. Best of luck on all your assignments and future undertakings! I will never be left out with a soulmate as such ^^ and the other miserable one as well haha!A friend in need is a friend indeed.Thx for all the companions...sounds weird aye?!Just get used to my civility from now on.

PS : Saw this lady talking on phone in the train with thunderous voice like no one's business while choking on her apam balik!Hell, I thought we are not supposed to eat or drink on train?!What on earth was it?Malaysia has certainly got no rules.I wish I had the courage to approach her and shove my socks into her mouth in the school of manner and then bona fide wipe the apam balik all over her hideous face for the interest of the public.*roll eyes and proceed to walk on nonchalantly*.Damn you know how stinky our trains are yet still couldn't help but contribute more to make it worse.I think we should run a campaign to urge fellow Malaysians on putting deodorants or perfumes in the public as well.Honestly,I don't hate smells but to make an exception,I hate foul smells especially in a cabin with dense passengers(KTM in particular) and I can't stand people who practically burp in your face or somewhere around you. We shall send all these peoples to the gas chamber for good,if not fart in their face with the best you can.

PPS : Mark is selling perfume in The Curve finally(Jean Paul Gaultier and Bvlgari)!Go support him for all you can la...cos he will get all his commissions and half of his paycheck belong to me... :D Somehow I'd still prefer Mont Blanc series,Dunhill series and DKNY all the apples that I supposed missing from his shelf.

~~~~~

Each friend represents a world in us,a world possibly not born until they arrive,and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.

A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.

A friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else.

A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.

A friend is one who believes in you when you have ceased to believe in yourself.

True friend is never serene and remember that every good friend was once a stranger!

Honesty and truthfulness = best policies in friendship

Neon streetlights overshone

My emoness has got the better of me recently...I skipped meal, sleep and dream and all. But I realised all I need was only foods to keep my morale high. After 2 consecutive meals with Charles today...I would say I'm more contented and less emo!^^v call me crazy call me mad I don't give damn!

Mr. Dominic Loh thanks for ffk-ed me that day, I wanna treat you PJ Old Town bak kut teh but you yourself ffk...damn it's like you built me a hope but tore it down after 5 minutes. Next time I'll shove some pai kuat up your ass as a lesson for you!Hehe...joking, later Kei will gonna kill me!

Anyway,thank god it was yet another day I didn't get robbed today for the night out and walking back all alone at 11.30pm along the deserted streets.You know nowadays we can't take safety for granted especially in JB. Crimes have already became a norm. Life is getting cheaper and insecure in Malaysia...that is why it often gets me worried about my parents' safety back in hometown than my own here. KL aren't that bad at least you'll see police car patrolling. Back in JB this phenomenon is non-exist. Neighbourhoods are also very lackadaisical about the awareness, even if their lives are at stake. People just tend to rely upon others to flame the initiative just because a simple fact that we are LAZY.











Can you sort out the sequence of those photos? Basically just nothing but the stupid emo crawling beneath. Emo is bad for health and emo kid is fag! I wanna be a grown up even god has forsaken my existence *roll eyes*



The 1st pic was taken on my way back from KTM with the companion of a random pedestrian and some streetlights.



The 2nd pic is like so old school kopitiam. It was taken in Little Penang I think.



3rd one was pointless...just to try out my phone's macro ability and it turned out sucks!Carl Zeiss' fiasco!



4th...*pauses*...well I smoke whenever I am down, emo and stress. 'Till now I've only managed to blow 3 sticks for the entire week. The rest I will give away or dump them...I swear, it's bad for health. Do not try this at home!



***



It always amazes me to think that every house on every street is full of so many stories; so many triumphs and tragedies, and all we see are yards and driveways.

How amazing right?

Thoughts after I woke up

My sleep was being interrupted at 7 am again for unkwown reason...my biological clock went cuckoo I guess.Then attempted to sleep again,managed to dream a little bit which I forgot what was it but then again constantly awakened by nothing in an interval of 30 minutes.If it was not annoying,I don't know what else is the best word to describe.Unintentionally,I let out some swearing words by the time I woke up...bah!

I had a sudden thought of the MV of "How To Save A Life" by The Fray...it's just too meaningful for any reasonableman to comprehend.Not even me!Compared to that crappy LP's "What I've Done" MV that emphasize on politics which I beg that don't even know shits about the realities,The Fray is way 1000 times better than them.I hate Linkin Park.

Today's grandma's birthday,supposed to go back JB this weekend since sis is around as well but was not in the mood.Regret!And I actually forgot how old is my grandma this year,what a useless grandson,I think should be around 78 almost reached 80 already.*scratches head*.I'm gonna give her a call for greeting later :s but afraid that she won't hang up the phone...lol

And one thing,my cousin who scored 2As 1B and 1C for his STPM wasn't able to grant any entrance to prestigious local and Sg Uni.Bummer!I think he applied to lotsa highly demanded courses and that could be the main reason.He has to end up in some Uni called KUITTHO(not sure the spelling la...) in Batu Pahat with overall campus population of 90% Malays.What to do,that's our so called "boleh" education system who does nothing but overshadow the talents of those talented.Take my advise,go either Sg or if u have that kinda money,go out of the region even if u're only able to study in al-cheapo uni in overseas but at least they don't overlook ur talents and potentials.Experience is what most important,once u have the money that u owned,further pursue Master degree in a more prestigious Uni if u're academically allowed la.Otherwise,u'll be just like a carbon copy of others not able to standout and shine.

*****

I know this sounds 80's but I just wanna post up the lyric of "How To Save A Life" by The Fray even if no one's gonna read it.

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life
How to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
How to save a life


What a unique set of lyric...I could have just wept everytime I see the MV but I DIDN'T!



I shall LOVE myself more than ANYTHING~

P.S : Reminiscing what you've done for the past is quite breathtaking sometimes, the courages and momentum to push you to the extremes beyond your expectation. Those days when you were equally crazy as any other things. Those days when you literally slacked for the entire days like no one's business, those days when you talked craps and yet still gained compliments and unanimous applause, those days when you were still very much mysterious and kept in the box, those days when you fully anticipated for what the future holds, those days when emo was pseudo, psycho was wacko...and those WERE the days.

Thoughts before I bed

Plugged on the eye massager after I did pores refining mask...soothed with some acoustic/jazz/celtic piece of notes like Paolo Nutini,Michael Buble,Jammie Cullum,James Morrison,Hayley Westenra,Secret Garden,Norah Jones...hoping they could just fly me to lalaland.

However...

I WAS WRONG!

...somehow I'm having a piece of mind stuck inside me...I've no idea what was it but it just wouldn't able to give me a kiss goodnight.Something arousing my feelings,something stirring beneath...something which I don't even know what is it actually that giving it the momentum to disturb me at this very hour.

>.<

Argh,I wanna sleep or else I'm gonna be a real panda soon...which I supposed less cuter than a koala.




Lift me up from the fields of sorrow while I'm seeking for the solace within

Bitchings

You'll be frequently seeing me here when I'm most probably not in good mood or rather when my naked face tells you that don't come fuck with me.I'm getting cynical lately simply because I hate everything except foods and burning fat for reasons that you shouldn't enquire any further.

Well,it many sounds unfriendly but get over it,I don't bite in real life.I'm completely a different person once walked out from the cyberspace.Lalala~Still I'm greatly disinterested in things revolving around me.

While I was browsing through some foodie bloggers' page,a sudden crave for varieties of foods came rushing and I couldn't help but to drool a few droplets of you-know-what on my keyboard whilst typing.

I swear in the name of mypuppiesyourbabiesmyneighbour'shamstersInti'slecturers that,if I get to eat these foods for the following days,I shall eradicate any of my obnoxious impromptu emo/moodswing that came out of no where with the unfortunate fact that I did not born with innate ability to pms :D too bad!Only with that I can officially wage impromptu emo vendetta against anything I want without being questioned...

Cut the crap,anyway...such foods shall include all the following listed below :

1. Bak Kut Teh (the all time fav. of mine!)
2. Satays and satays celup (another all time favourite delicacy)
3. Korean BBQ and all other Korean dishes (machissisooyo~)
4. Sukiyaki,okonomiyaki...must be like sizzling hot with lotsa fish flakes
(oiishidesune~)
5. Steamboat
6. TGIF Jack Daniel's Steak
7. Bakerzin's chocholate mousse,strawberry shortcake and tapas (if i can slurp down
the complete set la!)
8. Nasi Lemak(accept onlt the one in SS2,Mdm Kwan or Little Penang Cafe)
9. "Leng Tong" (slow brewed herbal soup)
10."Oo Luak" (a 2nd to none fried oyster with eggs in JB)I want the one from Meldrum
Walk only,strictly!
11.Panecotta!
12.Custard tarts,cheese tarts...and more bakeries!
13.Sorbet
14.Fondue
15.Green curry and Thai style fried chicken in Sunway
16.Seafood in Mega Ria or Gelang Patah :(
17.Dim sums and xiao long bao!
18.Crispy curry puff opposite Pelangi Leisure Mall
19.Kuay Chap or Kuay Teow Kia
20.Finally,mummy's cooking! (what else can be better than this?)

Alright,I should stop building castle in the air and off to my Anthro's text now since the chances that I won't be eating these are more than 100% .



What a pathetic bitching entry...*let out a sigh in disbelief*





How can you not tempted to the aroma of herbs? If you don't drool in the next 1 minute looking over the pic, go seek for your nearest doctor I reckon.

Morning has broken

Woke up at 6am today all thanks to Mr Yau who forgot to turn my light off -_-

My internet connection died on me yesterday before dinner due to computer memory overloaded XD...and I actually called TMnet technical operator around 9am lol...while they're still walking out from their lalaland.

Anyways,thx for taking the hassle to come all the way from Damansara,Mr Yau.If not my Friday will be like spending alone and still...alone!hehe...TGIF was damn packed yesterday :(

And I think I'm darn fat now again,gobbled down food like no one's business yesterday...the Fishmarket's platter,sushi,tart,doughnut,huge chicken drumstick and then sleep!Wah,it's been a while!Love this feeling of eating freely,talking freely and act freely without contraint~Life has never been so good...since the day I came back this place.

Slept on my Anthro text yesterday(just how boring u can ever imagine!)...pageful of words on puny issues that I don't even bother to know.This can be worse than Law man...and more to come.

Saturday Saturday...another boring weekend.I shall tidy up my room,do laundry,do some odd stuffs,do tutorials,revisions,go gym,go bookstore and talk to myself.

Monotonous.

When the ray of light continues to shine, it means there's still hope for life somewhere awaiting to be unmasked

What went wrong...

as per the title, I was wondering hard...

This beautiful uptown here aside from its robust street symphony, dense population, numerous upmarket shopping malls, parks, gyms, eateries, public transport....yadda!and MPSJ is doing their job well besides dealing with stray poos from cats and dogs around.

I saw grass cutter cutting grass every now and then, police car patrolling, humble neighbourhood.It is definitely n times better than what we get in JB.

This place does not lack of tranquility although it is highly urbanised.For once I saw monkey at the end of the corner of the road,and then squirrels...I mean the only thing I get from my hearplace is cats/dogs and more cats/dogs...they are stray but I still doted them eventhough they suffer from severe skin disease but still they are lives and I love animals.

Leave the global warming issue aside, SJ is breezy and full of city contrast.The noisy and the quiet sides mutually exist in harmony.People are more civilised...this I'm not too sure but I supposed KL/Selangor ppl are more well educated than the others.

When everything is so wonderful, it has to out of nowhere came some annoying cars with desperado drivers who do not adhere to the regulations...experienced once and do not wish to reminisce.Bummers...

Anywhere,take a stroll around the neighbourhood is really a wonderful experience whenever I slow down my pace on my way back after working out.Embrace by the boulevard along the road,looking at the folks strolling with their pets,jogging at the promenade...it's magnificient compared to the rather unwelcomed crowded daytime.

Things can slip away in a nanosecond,when u slow down ur rhythm and take a look at things around...that simplicity and brevity from hapiness is more than a chicken soup for ur soul.At least, it cheers u up for whatever reason...

I don't know but eventhough I'm steeping in it but then...my heart is refraining some part within me.I introspect every now and then still can't figure out and perhaps I love this place but on the other side of me I could have hate this place very much...it's a matter of timebomb and when it's gonna release.

But for now, I would say that I love it...I dread that the next thing.....well...food for thought...I shall think deeper indeed.Life is not gonna make me miserable afterall.





Suddenly the air smells much greener now, and I'm wondering around with a half pack of cigarettes, searching for the change that I've lost somehow

Think out of the box

Really fed up of ENL 101, keep doing some pointless stuffs like group presentation which can't do shits to improve my language.Groupmates are all computer wackos, so as expected things are all revolving around computer when it comes to assignment topics. Cmon give me a break k? I'm like computer illiterate and who cares since I'm not gonna major in any shits to do with computing.*Gasps*

Today's CAL quiz was also kinda sad case.2 questions, completed one but the other forgot to integrate the equation in the parentheses...yea it's da outside-inside rule shits that applied.So there it goes, should be getting some odd marks for identifying the u,v,du and dv...

The common date for our final is around August and they said it was being brought forward which means we gonna sit for that earlier for the benefit of those summore students.I should move my ass on for revision in very soon.Damn mofo!!!

And yea, this ditcher Samsul got gf edi never inform me and keep it in his cave...wtf is going on with this macha.So forgetful.It's like such a bummer, can't make it to my Ale200507's outing next week...

Alas,DASHNI!!!U better plan for some serious clubbing outing or else ur puppy dies and I'll top u up with XXX Rums until u tell who's da best!TO the left to the left...lol.

Shucks,supposed to be very down and depressed of late,the writing mood here is so wrong...I better get back and shower myself with grievance and WRATH.Don't fuck with me unless u wanna taste my fists.

ps: sis will be back this weekend but I can't go back this time around.Anthro mid term's next Tuesday 5-7pm...hell...night exam.

speechlez

Ms Jane is very weird recently for no reason(reasons that I dunno la)...

I kept on hearing she told Lik Siang's group that "Kok Whei is better..."(in ascending tone, mind you damn annyiong k?) and yesterday she was trying to match-make me up with a mediocre looking Chinese girl in that main group element.And that girl was like blushing cos she just got into relationship with another guy in our class.I dunno what happened to her...seriously.Why can't I just be alone, it's not even a crime to stay as single at my age, I can remain as monomer my whole life if I want...afterall I got nothing to lose,I have my lovely family and friends, for me it's more than enough apparently.

And yay, my semester break is up to 3 weeks I guess!Planning for some trip, Charles suggested Macau, Shen Zhen, HK, Cambodia, Bali, Bangkok, Phuket and Kota Kinabalu but I've had enough of China so guess I should travel within the region...haiz...but I think most of them not having any break overlap with us since by that time most Uni will be having intake...NUS and NTU are August and local Unis should be around that also.Ah bummer!

In conclusion

I shall practise self-appreciation from now on in midst of showering with doubts from all around.

If I ain't myself who else am I gonna be then?

Don't judge me cos u ain't me...

I love myself more than anything more than u can ever imagine...

I don't preach but the greatest love of all is learning to love urself.

I'm still on my way...

Well, it's fatigue and constantly putting myself in tension and unwanted emo-ness state are futile to say the least.

Not anymore.

I love myself...I'll do everything for myself eventhough to die for IT.

Anyway, Cal II test was kinda screwed up but it turned out to be higher than what I've been expected for...still not really through with it yet!

Lab report is getting cumbersome since my lab partner always MIA...haiz.

And I got some comments for my groupmates whilst doing ENL assignment, please be coordinative and cooperative. Divide the works equally at the same time knowing what others are doing as well.Don't push responsibilities to others when u can't do ur job well.And please cut down ur lengthy essay, yes of cos I know ur ability of writing in English is like celestial(lack of better word to describe) but assignemnt is where assignment rules applied.Don't push ur limit too far and leave us with ur donkey works.And u still have the cheek to tell us that how sad that ur beautiful senteces were being striked over under our cruellest judgement of holding down the backspace key...fuck off and burn in hell.For that I have to wake up in fucking 7 am today and do ur summarising jobs while my class was only started at 12 pm...I could have snuggle in my bed comfortably.AND why must I print it for u all at last minute and without being informed that article was needed?U made me rushed my puny life back home by leaving Anthro class earlier and got late for ENL class...and u don't even bother to look at my works.For that passenger, u oso one who has the cheek to sms me early in the morning b4 my alarm rang...good...and u didn't come for ENL class today just hoping us to write down ur divine name on the frontpage to claim some shameless credits...I'll slap u nicely once I see u...perhaps bitchslap will be more appropriate,if not more.

Apparently,I just hate everything...all mankinds are evil and hyprocrites.

What on earth is this...someone please gimme a good hard punch straight in my face!

Sick

Went to orang temuan village today.a downpour was expected.further contributed to my sickness.the batin aka tribeshead was ok but the villagers werent quite frenly and cooperative!we didnt reap much infos from them afterall instead out of nothing kena invited to a interracial marriage ceremony between temuan and chinese sabahan muslim.super weird.forced to interview a pak cik as he was being too kind to us in a way we didnt wish for haha.then stucked at the roadside bus stop nearly an hour whilst waiting for the rain to stop!sneeze...i miss home T.T esp when im sick.i need homemade remedies.

Junkies

Do I look like a modern walked-out-from-some-famous-novel-based-movie goblin that having capability of swallowing 5 in one mouthful?

If not,why did my housemates so scared of bumping into me?While I was at the gate outside yesterday about to walk in to the living room,Icould see that he was watching TV while indulging in his usual stick but the moment I unlocked the lock that he heard me,there he goes,switched off the TV and rushed into his nest for good before I could even take off the lock from the latch...the entire process was conducted in less than 5 seconds.He supersonically flew back his nest before we having any unwanted eye contact.

For this,I should politely excuse myself and give him my both middle fingers and then follows by words of wisdom begin with the big F...who cares like I owe them 10000K or killed their babies.Stuck up face...go burn in hell la...bunch of hypocrites.I detest hypocrites the most,they are the worst creatures ever living on earth after mosquitoes.I should just invent something called "hypocriticides" to eliminate them COMPLETELY!Go burn in hell...

And I really cannot through with few persons in my class...so super childish can!And also hypocrites...I feel like dismissing them with roll eyes motion and present them fingers of glory right in their face,not forgetting some nice swearings begin with F.

PS: Ms Kalai again asked me to go for emcee audition after her failure attempt of persuading me to join debate team...jiak pah boh dai ji jor!

Today was full of anger and frustrations!On top of disheartening...this week gotta do my Anthropology's fieldwork summore.Mind you is an overnight fieldwork with lotsa taboos cos we are "invading" an aboroginis(sakai) village which we may not know what will happen even if we got cast by spell or some voodoo shits.God knows...so spooky.

Mood-o-meter

.....

sad--*----------------------------happy

mode : disheartening...

:(

sucks aye!

Ms Kalai asked me to join English debate team adn I was so taken a back...if not cursing.She was mad I bet cos I can write adequately well but when it comes to speaking,IMPEDIMENT!That's it, kthxbai.

Chem test 1 result was ok...I'm above average or within the range of average in class.Thank god I'm not below that.If not seriously I need a tough shits of wall to bang my head against!Today's quiz was just as fine too,since only few peasy questions on Thermochem...Cal 2 is completely cancelled for this week so I have more buffer time before I get my worst result ever in life...before I die of looking at my Cal 2 test 1's score.

And hereby I declare my blog as my 2nd ego named BARNEY!It's officially a Barney's blog now that I can finally write to...-_-...shall find myself a purple green template.

Futile

ool...went on a roadtrip with Uncle and his monkey roommie Japheth back to his hometown at Karak last week, was quite fun actually since it resembles Kota Tinggi but in a smaller scale. Food was nice(the pig intestine porridge were quite orgasmic cos they fried it!) and reasonable priced but too bad I wasn't in a good appetite of late which I dunno why, I don't think I'm having anyone's babies.LOLx.NOT FUNNY *shrugs*...if only the trip can be longer....

Boredom level at this point reaches the optimum as u can see...dunno why beats me!I'm so fucked up...

And Chemistry lecturer actually knows my name afterall, I got shocked cos usually I'd just stare hard and cold at her when she tells lame jokes.Not bad a lecturer afterall and I got so much attention from her today until she can't stop yelling my name in front the whole class -_-.My lab report for example, she told the whole class as if I did a very awesome greatwork on my experiment 4 report until everyone came asked me about the calculations and conclusions SUPER DASH UNDERSCORE DASH!I just copied them from my back-then Inti Nilai's report...really gek sei!I hate attention...I sound so rebellious right, like I care huhu!

Chem quiz this wed...and calculus 2 classes all cancelled for this week due to unforseen circumstances of Ms Shanta.She failed to send me a notification mail...and everyone else received except me kena ffk."NVM".

This week should be able to lay back a lil' bit despite the fact that I'm having some lame ENL 101 assignment to do...the topic is pain in ass really.Can someone tell me what the fuck is "My Ideal OS?"Credit to my groupmates for coming out with this since they are all taking CSC this sem...nabeh!Luckily my task is kinda light...if not...ish!

ANT 101 fieldworks still clueless now,no one's going to Jabatan Org Asli means no approval means no fieldwork means victory!Hulu Langat is way too near...other groups are going all the way to Cameron Highlands,Taiping and so on so forth but ours...within vicinity...the divine Cheras Kajang district about 30 minutes drive away.Petrol go dutch...no subsidization.Grrrr!Sien...all the kayu groupmates totally potong stim!

And I got a new Chem lab partner today also kayu but she's a girl after all...yeah a SHE.So I'll just not gonna make any fuss out of it.Afterall she's 1000X better than the previous one.

Anyway,I shall count my blessings from now on cos life is getting tougher *pouts*...I AM SO EMO AND MOODY.Nobody knows but god...and my ego BARNEY!

sighs....I miss home.

PS:I think my rush for sticks is pumping up again out of so many calamities,stress and emo...smoking is bad for health haiz!T^T But I'm holding back for this time...hopefully.

Symphony

Symphony of sickness

Be them or not physical or mental ones

Physically tired doesn't mean you can put your mental into hibernation for time being

You gotta fucking move your ass on for good

It's even worse to give up than stemming the tide

Won't be a coward anymore

...

Neither do I feel worse off nor better off

I could be stuck at a static point already

Shall wait for longer perhaps

Cos

Whatever that can't defeat you just makes you stronger

AND STRONGER!

Nostalgic

Going back to the non-existence living hell that I belong(supposed) tomorrow.How fucking great to have a morning trip at 10 am where I can actually just snuggle in my comfy bed at HOME(the next best paradise for a nester like me...).Tell me,how great it is....

Sue can't pick me up cos obviously she has a date to answer whereby I am gonna 1st time in my life alight at Puduraya,that shabby old bus terminal full of roaches and rodents and some other unseen creatures like beggars and scavengers out of nowhere....to take a transit back to Subang that oh-so-cosy-comfy-mummies-crying-babies-fucking drop dead gorgeous shelter of mine.Definitely,none other words can best describe it,simply sucks!

Today was just like food feast.I'd eaten the amount that enough to feed the entire population of Africa(except Egypt and S. Africa la...).Force-dragged along to eat some run of the mill Dim Sums early in the morning where the feeling of awakening was exactly 5 hours later.Then proceeded to Jusco cos sis was buying some stuffs for her trip and guess what,Stefanie Sun was here tonight but I forgot to bring my tics back -_-.

Watched that movie directed by Jack Neo starring Lao Zha Bor...not as funny as what I expected.Kinda lame but meaningful though.Nice try...

And again so many relatives came over today as well...couldn't fall into a good nap.Annoying...a lil' bit.Thank god my lil' nephew saved my day,just how cute a baby can be!*dabbing cheek*

Fine,Chem test and lab on Monday...actually sometimes I feel that why not they just cut my throat ends it instead of this perpetual torturing.Kudos to ADP...an ever wonderfully wonderful degree programme!

Pissed.

Weight Management

Surprisingly,me lost 5kgs in just less than a month.Thx to FF...and pay me for the advert!

But somehow,I think I look haggard and much more lok-yeng now...credit of those fucking stress I must say.

65 will be my normal target where 60 is ultimate target.lolx.Hope my health level can go on par with it.And the fucking calves still look so bulgy and fat!OMG...

nuff of bitching...I guess.

Lotsa relatives came over my hse today...my sleep wan totally kena interrupted off and on.Pek chek.

I'm going under

Haih...came home over the weekend.I mean my home in JB not Subang...I'll never regard that place as home,it's only a temporary shelter over head,to say the most.

Sis flight was postponed to next Tuesday so basically I can't send her all the way to Changi Airport's departure gate.This time around cannot ponteng as well,3 test on consecutive days starting Monday.

For this week,I missed 5 hours of classes.3 hours Cal II and 2 hours Chem.Partly was I couldn't wake up on time(actually if I rushed my life for it...probably still can make it to few classes),the other part was perhaps emo?I dunno.Felt sucks...practically sucks big time.Like I ever care.

I seriously sick of being joker and clown all the times.I hate my loosely expressions that sumtimes irritate ppl or giving them wrong impressions.I can be very quiet when I'm all alone but in any situation that having 2 or more presence of people,I will always try hard to melt the ice when it get tensed up,and it actually happens to me all the times for reasons that yet to be unveiled.So I'll handle all the monkey business...the life like I don't even have my own sentiments.One word : sicked!

I don't mind to be emo or up to even higher level psycho...but pls just allow me to be serious at times.I mean it.Kthx...

Today's Anthro test was quite ok and in fact fun!The essay part is so amusing...we'd been asked to write a self description by hollistic approach.lolx.cute...

And for some fucking babies killing mummies crying reasons,my T zone is badly fried with zits and blackheads.I look fucking hideous now,I swear I am...eventhough it makes no difference without those zits but still...much more hideous can?Satisfied?Seriously like moh peng now,soon to be Mark Lee's face with cellulites texture...goddammit!I musn't be nocturnal from now on,or else your neighbours' dogs die :p

Ps:I met Sheryl in KTM and had a good talk with him.She's such a cutie.
Pps:Cheryll J. best of luck in ur IELTS...7.5 or above is in ur hand for sure!Steph,all the best to ur SAT as well...dun give up!

I WANT A NEW PDA SO BAD!AND THAT FISH EYE LOMO.GIMME PLS!