Down,Drown

Had been sitfling this issue for quite sometime until I just did a soft mentioning about it again some minute moments ago...

I really don't know but just happened to ask about the ADP intake on March to dad,least to my surprise,still getting all sorts of rubbish and indecisive answer.

Was shoo-ed away by him(that's what I felt),they just seem to be avoiding this topic whenever I snap on this topic before them.I thought mum was on my side all the while but to my disappointment,she didn't...instead flaming more orthogonal yet impractical remarks which kinda driven me few steps backward to where I was.

Ok,it may sounds demanding but at least just try to be more understanding and ease me up with statements correspondent to my queries,right?Not just passively fling my pieces of thought away and let the matter rest in the meantime like we all don't even care.

To add on,sis has been the one that really blown off my morale at his own jealousy and usually that kinda hullabaloo one...which can usually cross the path and causes me to hold back those fists.Not to that kinda extent yet at this stage of negotiating :/

I just couldn't think of any other courses that can light my jazz on currently.I don't seem to show my interests in any other courses especially business courses.I especially hate it when they ask me to sign up with business course in an "experimental" fashion!Hey,it's my OWN future(I know though I'm not paying for it...) but how can they spout this kinda nonsense to dare to prank on my future?Simply signing up a business course is such a disheartening and desperate statement.I'll never can predict my future.So by all means,I have all the rights to make my own desicion(again though I'm not paying for it...),don't I?

I hate to be sorry for my earlier thoughts that ruined my entire life.....regrets will not gonna reappear in my dictionary again like how they ever were!I've made mistakes before and I hate to reminisce it and bring it back to materialization AGAIN!

Shit man,I feel so sucky right now...and my life can never be more stressful than that.Tension from working,tension from deciding,tension from the ignorance of them...will soon store me into wonderland below in the loving memory of "me",then rest in peace.

Still counting down the days to go...to bury me