Anomalies
It's funny when I think of it everytime...
I'm extremely bad in judgement sometimes especially towards others that I always thought I'm very good at it. In fact, that could be the silliest joke of the century I proclaim.
The thing is, people that I'm hating or used to hate are often the one who care most about me and get alerted when I'm emo. Oh well, my extent of caring is not too large in degree, just words of console will do by any means. Ain't that hard afterall I supposed.
And I dare to say, I used to hate Cheryll back in those days before we turned bestie. Even the girl whom I used to hate in my class currently approached me after she saw my emo personal message on MSN...she left me soooo speechless and least expected about it.
On a contrary note, people whom I care a lot and love to bit are less sensitive to my emotional swinging. Like how funny right? Maybe I've been thinking and expecting too much from them which I shouldn't be in the first place. Or maybe they are just not the ones that I should give my love and caring to or I've been hiding too much of my feelings to them? Someday they might just throw me a words or two and get me afflicted which in fact further established my statement above...who knows?
Perhaps they are too complicated beyond comprehension or I'm just way too naive to comprehend the meaning of life and relationship...
Mum just called anyways, Grandpa nearly passed away today in specialist centre (he was badly struggling in the ward and almost let out his last breath) but thank god he was saved for the time being. This time, doctor suspect it is cancer of the colon or stomach (probability of 20% upon initial diagnosis) . Bad things are ushering him to the worst situation at once especially this few months. My cousin sister was passed away during my AS final back in last year...I hope my final is not a bad omen to amount to anything bad :( . I'm such a jinx...
I think a lot of my relatives are coming back from overseas soon and my sister as well. God bless him and save him from the bads.
.......after all these, I'm just a smile-coated lifeless soul, if not more. Don't expect me to play around much this season.
*****
"Lim-kay" (Teo-Chew pronunciation)
