Bad Bad Bad

Man,this is the most depressing thing that could ever happen on me.

Guess what?

Law paper 1 was fucking easy!All the question came out b4...

And this is nothing to be happy of...cos I'm overjoyed and failed to manage my time evenly!

It's jus too much things and points to write there.I spent alost 45 minutes on the 1st question where I only suppose to spend about 30 min. on each question(sickish 1 and a half hour for 3 essays averagely 2 pages full per essays...fuck!).Well,I'm not surprise though cos tht's "me" style where I will spent excessive of time on each and every single question in order not to left out any useful points.Yea,tht's my motto,to maximise the marks as many as possible...but then I rarely practice on those question with time restriction(mostly taking my own sweet time to do...).So partially contributed to the state I am today...T.T...should I long for an "A" summore?Cos I couldn't finish the last question as usual.The band marks will be very low usually for my 3rd question...it goes like 1st:3 pages,2nd:2 pages,3rd:1 and a half pages...it goes descending as so for the marks that will probably obtain!I felt like shit jus now and doom...when I come to think of I'm so short of thime for the last question.It's not that I dono what to write but if the invigilator would be so kind to spare me another 5 min. I can done that with 3 pages completely full of the relevant points...fuck holy cow!I wanna write more but no time....!They collected the paper 1 minute earlier....how can...do u know how much I can write within 1 minute?????Fuck you!Now,the hope for getting an A for Law has been very obscure....what a big disgrace!

As for Statistics...I'm not very sure but those answers are mostly link to each other which simply means u must obtain the answer in a) in order to proceed to do b)...if a wrong...it'll implicate the whole question which averagely carrying 10 marks each on Stats paper!Fuck!Currently,I got a very silly mistake made on question 6) last two Qs.Where I inversed the whole variable used where supposingly A should be written in column B and the other way round.I'm so dumb stupid foolish...how can I????!!!!It's the frequency table!!!!Fucking do-able!Now 7 marks gone from that and the only thing to hope for is to get some "kesian" marks and some substitution/correct formula used marks...those insignificant marks!Fuck there goes my A again!!!Time to say goodbye to distinction!The freaking thing is that I couldn't even do the 1st question properly...omg...same case duplicated from P1's incident...man!Spirits are totally dampened...luckily the following questions still consider do-able...but not equiv. as score-able here-_-!Arghhh..........how come like this.........y should they give me marks that so close to A(prediction) but not A?I mean cmon,if u wanna spare me marks pls....let me get A's...or else just give me lower Bs will be better off....at least further from the A standard!It feels better...not too "kek sim" afterall rite....?

Now...my last papers to come are the Econs papers (1 & 2) on next Friday.Have to wait 8 freaking days...but of cos more time to study now...gonna push push tush and pia harder for A in Econs!!!No matter how!!!I jus dun fucking care!I'm crazily obsessed over getting A's.........fyi....I'm a typical kiasu A-levels by-product!

And furthermore,I hope I can do better and harder in A2 sem to amend the losses I gain in AS.Although A2 is way more difficult to score but who cares,no more clubbing,no more movies,no more slacking,no more procrasticnating for next sem.The thing tht I allow to do for next sem is to study study and just study until my ass off to get an average marks of "70+(A)"inclusive AS+A2 results in total then average....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!I've gone berserk!!!!!!!!

Fucking u better give me an AS+A2=140/2=70(A!)....that's the divine formula/equation that I'm talking about when I finish all my A-levels exams (AS and A2).....it's not just AS did very good but A2 sucks badly....or the other way round also...if that's so,it makes no fucking difference.I want the total marks for AS+A2 to be 70 and above after divide by 2...fyi...the weightage for both AS and A2 is equal (50%-50%).Let's say if I got 70 for AS then 70 for A2 then the total will be 140 and average it by dividing it with 2 will get 70%....tada!!!...The A's standard for A-freaking-levels!70 enuff for me....I'm not tht greedy though!Deal?70 for AS/A2....-_-it's already at the borderline lah for 70%.Huhu...T.T......sobz sobz!

Bless me!

Mum asked me to pray hard for A's by now.Dun hope but pray...how pathetic it is...OMFG!

Gotta off to sleep edi,KO edi this few days after persistently studying for so many freaking days but turned out to be not very happy...kinda waste...hope when I wake up everything will be new and of cos brand new feeling to face the challenges ahead!

Ush!ZZzzzzz -_-

Tainted badly...

I'm so fed up,screwed up,fucked up,tensed up...

So in a bad mood now!

Don't ever dare to try me or else you'll taste the blood...

Sick of living in this dirty filthy vanity world!

It's meaningless and pointless...

Hatred and anger no where to vent!

Chance-less to confide yet hard to conceal...

Gradually pushing me to the extreme.

But I still believe there's still a single hope in life.

Nothing is impossible and impossible is nothing though.

Watch out behind you!

The silent predator has come into reviviscence.

Eternal Flame

Ok,

The dread has "flamed" itself again whenever I saw my parents.Well,they are here over the weekend so probably I gotta procrastinate my revision again.

I'm so traumatised whenever i see their face cos it's for sure I'll wanna tell them what I'm gonna study after A-Levels.But then the common downside for A-Levels students is lack of idea for what they wanna pursue in future.If you ask anyone from A-Levels they'll probably answer you things like "see first!","depend on my result!","dunno!",not sure","medicine!" but those wanted to do med. know shits about med.In contrast,ADP students are very future-concerning type and they plan ahead,me "was" one of them!If you ask an ADP student what they wanna study in future,before you can ever further your questioning,he/she will cuts in and started to talk to you like machine gun about what they want in future and what is that about,yada yada!Now,that's the difference of Commonwealth(General Certificate of Education) standard and North American(Credit system) standard.That's why I was wondering sometimes that how could this A-Levels examination survive itself from then 'till now with it's rigid and stiff assessment and teaching?It's totally problematic and wrong.Whereby,I was once in ADP and I know how flexible they are and students are taught to be outspoken,we even require to take up the Public Speaking Skill subject.Furthermore,they'll never fail to give us counselling on our future prospect once a while and every end of semester(after we gotten the result).They'll counsel us on the uni. that compatible with our requirement,make sure you can maximise your credits that going to be transferred and advise you on the course that you chose.This is something that won't ever happen under Brit. edu. system.What they will do is just force you to study and get all A's in order to apply to Oxbridge,no further.This is why I can't sort out that why do people keep on criticizing ADP as a low standard/low class program compare to other pre-U or matriculations.Don't belittle it cos you ain't taking it nor took it before.

Cut the craps.

I'm deciding some other programs to study now after my pre-U studies,here's few of my latest decision(it's still not certain yet):

~Economics and Finance(super normal non-breakthrough subject)
~Economics(a extremely normal non-breakthrough subject)
~Econometrics(to make myself crazy about interpreting complicated graphs)
~Real Estate Management(to be a valuer...)
~Financial Risk Management(similar to ACSC below)
~Actuarial Science(time to polish and strengthen my maths and econs I think)
~BioInformatics (amphibian!fusion of science and statistics)
~Psychology(it's hard to make a huge way from it but I like it though)
~Environmental Management-Toxicology/Waste Management(it's interesting!although I dun wish to waste most of my Arts subjects)
~Statistics(rocks although I'm not really excel in it :P)

Countries that I'm in favour of to further my studies:

~Canada(ADP)
~US(ADP)
~UK(not until I take Law)
~Australia(Business programs perhaps,twinning only)

Local don't have much choices though,sad to say that!

What I want is a profession which can really materialize my skills and do practical works rather than just keep on doing the samething again and again which bound to be lack of challenges.I prefer case study subject where I can analyse on case by case basis(despite Law).It has to be something to do with our society,real life and environment.Most of all,it serves all mankind.No doubt $alary is a very important factor too!I dun like things like require study,study but study.Again,I prefer problem solving more than anything.

I need feedbacks and comments from everyone if possible!Please dun be stingy on your opinion k?

Vacation Therapy!!!

Since dunno when all of us has been discussing about organising trips of getaway during the sem. break.Currently,I have 2 trips in my hand :

1)The still-proposing Pulau Redang trip with my college mates.
2)Genting trip with my JB old pals.(not again,omg,I'm sick of Genting...I like beach and sun!)

But no doubt the purpose that I'm carrying with is to enjoy quality time with my friends.Of course a fascinating destination is somewhat important to but in this case,they're placed behind the 1st priority.

Actually I do not organise any of that trip but I have to thank them for the harship that they're having to pay.Especially dealing with the travel agency,transportation,co-ordinating,set of date,publicity and not forgetting the cost that gonna blow off their phone bill.Once again,thanks you all for the of the arranging trips.

Pulau Redang:
~Isti!You are the one who came out with this idea better get this done or else you gonna suffer on next sem.
~Kei,please push Isti on that and advises him k?
~Steph.Nah!Remember what you told me today?I know you have a friend catering for tourism services back in Penang.Perhaps,it can be easier to travel from Penang afterall due to the adjacency from Terengganu following the newly completion of the East-West Highway which I believe to be stone-threw away from any places in Penang.Don't forget you are from the Prai k?It's off-island and lying on the peninsular part.No doubt it would be nearer to the E-W Highway rite?If Isti failed to organise,you must take over his place for the sake of all of us *cross fingers with twinkling eyes*

Genting:
~Charles,I know you almost done your part and looks like I'm "forced" to go or else the trip will seems going to be miscarriage.Well,with my absence will be well connected and contributed to the absence of another person.Thus,I don't wanna implicate all of you all due to my "undue" influence in this case huh?!
~Felicia,make sure you won't let the history repeat itself again or else I won't be as lenient as last time.I'm gonna blow your cover off this time and give you a blast.Don't bee foolish or else I'm gonna sound you badly again this time and please don't be the black sheep all the time and overcome your childishness please!Stop being so demanding anymore.
~Bock,I won't reject your proposal to Air Papan cos I luv sun and beach afterall more than anything.If given any chances,I rather choose to go to the shore!!!Club Med!!!Bali!!!Langkawi!!!Redang!!!And the extreme,cruise trip on the CARRIBEAN SEA!!!Woohoo...*raise eyebrows and winks*...fat hope it seems-_-
~Janet,I got nothing much to demand from you though.Just bring along yourself and have fun with us.Perhaps Bible might do well?LOL...no lah!...Just be supportive in whatever Charles is doing for the trip.

On top of that,I think I better get readay for what I'm gonna do during my upcoming sem. break.Or better yet,I'm gonna do up a memorandum that listed all the things I'm gonna do beside sleeping and doing nothing but idly facing the computer and idiot box.For sure I'm gonna cheung-K for perhaps twice in a week?My cheung-K kaki's,take note of it if you see this post.Continue on my diet plan is a must during break although I'll usually gain weight when go back to my home sweet home(just how awful and terrible of the food here you can ever imagine of!).Mum's cook the best of all but have to ration my food consumption though (T.T).Well,I'm still thinking of doing a personal project of my own during this sem. break but couldn't think of any so far.Any suggestion out there,guys?It'll be much appreciated.

Return to the present,my mind is all about studying now and to do well in my remaining AS papers.Nothing else can fill in my brain at this stage other than that.Now my only motivation would be the excitement I can derive after my AS exams,yay,summer vacation getaway,here I come!

Oh yea,there's a pleasant and dramatical change that I'm so looking forward to my coming much anticipated Graduation Day(previously known as premature Graduation Day and not pms please!).I just receive the news from my law lecturer that I'll be going to receive a honourary merit award for my law result!I mean wth,this kinda result deserve for an award?I strongly doubt their standard cos people that know me for sure they'll know the subject that I dislike most at this point.Yea,yours truly subject is what I'm referring.Coincidentally and paradoxically,I get myself a compliment from it.Bummer!Now,I'm so confusing edi cos if I tell my parents they for sure will persuade me on continuing my then-ambition to be a lawyer!Fuck I hate law no matter how,it's an undeniable fact k?And then so confuse of what to wear during the ceromony now!Would it be embarassing to go on the stage twice?Omg I'm gonna blush soon... *faint*

I screwed my flute practising too cos too long didn't practice due to my packed timetable...

I'm gonna watch the most anticipative movie of the year after the "Memoirs of A Geisha",the "Da Vincci Code" this Friday at Summit -_-...suppose to be Digi Imax Theatre but fully booked,too bad,common phenomenon for popular movie.Sien!

Well,still,

AS exams arghh...

Next sem(final sem,determinative sem.),A2 syllabus,gonna be very tough this time.But the light is,I probably will join FF next sem if I get my parents consent!!!(yeah,I mentioned on previous post that they actually forced me to do so-_-...I got no transport to travel to SUMMIT everyday or maybe frequently although it's vy near but sorry still beyond the walking distance that I can accept :p)

ME..?Yea,that's me!

Some updates on my exams so far...

Law Paper 1 is quite easy and I'm very satisfy with it so far.

Pure Maths 1 is the thing I won't get any satisfation but still the thing that makes me upset is although the question came out today can consider quite average and normal or easy as usual(unlike Oct/Nov 2005 tht difficult),cos we'd already prepared for the worst but then luckily still quite do-able I'd say.Just that the 1st question I already stucked and I got the wrong answer.3 marks gone to the thin air.I's so pissed that whenever I thought it was easy(sure I won't be that lucky all the while though).And then after the exams during our discussion among friends(as usual lah!)...we often compare our answer and the problem is my anwer always different from what they had.What I mean "they" is like I'm the one and only odd that having different answer and have to suffer as being a minority.And they'll started to be very determined on their answer and directly doubt my answer as their 2nd reference.WTF rite?But in this case today,I got a strong intuition that although my working for those question is alrite so far(at least I did not applied the wrong formulae watsoever!) but then the answer I got is most probably wrongin my opinion(it's not like i'm totally lose faith on myself it's just that I think that's what I am,I'm not talented in it nor badly sucks in it either)...nah!U see those that doubt my answer is those scholarly bright student.As for me,I'm an average student with very inconsistent result.Sometimes good but sometimes bad too.

So in short,I won't say that I screw up my maths(yea,I'm not tht kinda person tht having supersonic brain processing power,in the case of doing maths,I need atleast 3 hours to ponder and think on every single question if u allow me so...I can assure to u that I'll get a distinction for it.Time is a very importnt factor for me.Therefore,I think my main problem is due to the time given is insufficient for me to complete those 11 questions in 1 and a 3 quarters hours.Again,if sufficient time is given to me,I'll reassure tht I can get an A.This is how I usually do and get for my tutorials and past year papers.Cos i'm able to sit down free and easy to complete my work without any restriction and pressure given.Therefore,I'll say I'm not meant for exams.However,one thing we can't deny is,society still using the examination system to evaluate and judge a person for what he/she has inside him/her.I'm so sick with it now...

But hopefully,I can do better this time in AS compare to the totally screwed Mock exams.At least,I nearly complete all the 11 questions on time.Just that the 1st question has already dampened my spirit to go further.Nonetheless,I still managed to complete it with flaws though.Question 10 is the only question that I almost blank out cos when I started to look back on that question,the time's up.And after tha then I realised how do-able is that question.Cos it's only about diffrentiating the equation and find the constant and min/max points.But before that I was like,wtf was it,and it seems so complicated for the graph on its appearance for me.Thus,I skipped it and do the others but when the time I realised it's already too late.So basically that question is in total mess and like a pile of shit I'm doing.In addition,without any answer came out after a long working step.Fortunately,it's still not totally blank,cos maybe I can be able to derive at least 1 or 2 marks from those randomly working steps.Hentam aje lah!Who knows rite?Better than none,1 mark here worth a gold mountain for me!!!I'm just so a typical A-Levels student which are stereotypically known as nerd,result-oriented and then boring.Cos that's wat I am in order to reach out for my BIG DREAM!

~this time I have to work real hard on my coming papers in order to amend the mistakes I'd made~

For Maths,it's still not the end of the world yet cos there's still Statistic paper 1 to go on next week.And if I can't get the result I want.I probably will resit it with A2 by end of the year.Cos if AS did badly,I can't think of doing better in A2 cos A2 is far more difficult than AS.So usually,we will only think of excel and do better in AS.We don't ever dare to think of doing good in A2 cos if AS cannot make it,it's most likely that A2 will be worse off...So no matter how,I must get the grade I want for AS in order to amend what I think I'll probably score in A2.If AS i did well but A2 sucks badly,I still won't feel worse off cos they'll take the average of 50:50 from it(divide 2 times 100) to get the total average.So AS is in case of u do badly in A2...tht's the concept among the A-L'ians!-_-

For Law,I won't be overjoyed at this moment cos the coming Law paper 1 is tougher and as usualwe are not given sufficient time to complete 3 essays(averagely 2 pages per essays but we are only given 1 and a half hours!!!)

FOr Econs,it falls on the last week of my exam. timetable.Therefore,I still can buck up for that.But nonetheless,I'm not looking forward to it especially Paper 2's essays question and paper 1's MCQ...don't ever underestimate A-Levels Econs. MCQ...it's far more tougher than u think it is.

~GOD BLESS ME~

Run!Escape!Avoid!

Snow Patrol - Run


I'll sing it one last time for you
Then we really have to go
You've been the only thing that's right
In all i've done.

And I can barely look at you
But every single time I do
I know we'll make it anywhere
Anywhere from here

Light up, Light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

To think I might not see those eyes
It makes it so hard not to cry
And as we say our long goodbyes
I nearly do.

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

Louder, louder
And we'll run for our lives
I can hardly speak I understand
Why you can't raise your voice to say

Slower, slower
We don't have time for that
All I want is to find an easier way
To get out of our little heads

Have heart my dear
We're bound to be afraid
Even if it's just for a few days
Making up for all this mess.

Light up, light up
As if you have a choice
Even if you cannot hear my voice
I'll be right beside you dear

~~~~~~~~~~
I just can't stop repeating this song above on my speaker.I'm too obsess to this song currently and it really strikes my perceptual for some of the lyric's lines.It's just so sad and unacceptable to fall apart sometimes.But come to think of it,it might not be as bad as you can think.Seperation may be the hardest and final resorting way to solve a problem it seems and so it hurts both.However,it is the most direct and straightforward way to prevent from further bruising and hurting on each other.You might as well as end at this point than having more suffering in future.If you think it won't bloom,there's no point keep on cultivate on it and realise the waste of your effort too late.

Well,come back to the meaning of the lyric,my interpretation is that a guy that having sense that he's going to be seperated from a girl that fails to express herself eventhough their freedom is at stake.The guy is so depress over this and feels like running away either alone or along with the girl to somewhere where they can be able to enjoy more liberty.And if not,the guy will choose to leave unilaterally but sworn to stay by her side eventhough he is physically absent beside her.It's kind of a typical lovey-dovey lyric but the point lies in the melody and composing of that song really materialize every meaning in it.The lyric has yet again alive!

"Puppy love is dessert and bound to be greasy overtime and tend to be sicked of it too fast;True love is the main dish where it serves with true anticipated purpose and often unforgettable after the meal"

Well,In my 20 cents,I feel that true love is really hard to achieve in this world and rarely happens.If it ever had,won't be lasting for too long.Because humans are fond of new things according to the nature principle.Once they get sick of somethings,although the love is still there but it's left to be defiled,it's just a matter of time only.Where the love exhausted,there,left only the spiritless shell that spell out how glamour WAS the true love USED to be THEN in contrast of what is it now!Sometimes,we just have to learn to let it go without nostalgia because the world changes uncertainty as to the feeling of the mankind.It's made of flesh and blood with emotions and perceptions implanted.When it comes to the time you have to let go,don't be hesitate,just tell yourself to relinquish it.You should feel better off because the next best thing will be coming on your way soon...
.
.
.
.
.

My Pure Maths. 1 exam is just 10 hours away and I bet you'll ask what the hell am I still doing here where I'm suppose to snuggle myself in my blanket and go on to build my dream castle.Aha,I'm kinda suffering from pre-Exams phobia.Well,besides feeling tensioned,I feel like walking around and making myself at awakening state.Maybe partly due to my over-actived brain cells or maybe the effect of caffein since yesterday morning.Bah,I just don't care a damn shit about that.Exams sucks as well as study!This is what I hate about the British education system so far.Exams sovereignty!No motivation at all for students and practical works seems to be deteriorated on its amount each year in Cambridge A-Levels.We hardly having any project or assignment.What we have to do is just study and do tutorials to call it a day.We have been taught to be result oriented and grades/marks will definitely going to determine what you are in future in this case.Lower grades/marks most probably potraying the obscurity of future prospect,worse to worse,left abandoned and defined as a bunch of fruitless.It's so sad that our colourful life is only worth a single piece of paper called the certificate.Without that we are undefined and be prepared for all sorts of reprimand that going to evaluate and assess your past performance nakedly.On top of that,I don't believe the thing as persistently working hard,you may find the light.If that so,why the needs for lecturer then if everyone cease to find a lecturer instead they deliriously carrying this stupid concept and believe to work on their on pointlessly.In my opinion,I think success has to depend on the tendencies and potentials lying beneath an individual too.If none of anyone there to exploit and discover the tendencies of someone,that someone in particular might just bring along their potentials and tendencies that they strongly believed to have into their tomb someday.What a waste and pathetic presumption to be made here huh?Well,we have to accept that these all are none other than the facts,no further.And sometimes those that having "stand-out" result in his/her little community circle tend to be overestimate themselves as they are blindfold by their own foolishness and short-sighted view.The world is beyond their imagination where there could be any other possibilities occur in front of them but the sad thing is they are all monocular vision-ed.Those narrow minded are them,those imature are them,yet,they crown themselves as elite and live in their own little limited space which full of foolishness.I so wanna laugh at these kind of people sometimes.They are very well-deserved for that!

Mother

I'm so tension now,

Just hereby to wish those that sitting for the effing AS/A2 exams this week a very good luck and all the best including me!

Happy Mothers Day to all the mothers out there!

I luv u mummy*lotsa kisses*
(I miss home so much!)

Eventhough words can't express my deeply gratitude for my mum,so I shan't write too much here!Practical actions matter most.

OH MY GOD...I can't believe my 1st paper gonna come in less than 24 hours...!Freaking tension now.

What if I did bad?

Gosh,I couldn't even bring myself to think of all those worst case scenarios,it's just so horrible to think.I rather study and study to numb myself up!

God bless~

Chances are given by heaven...

"I'll never give any chances to anyone from now on..."

Quoted from my classmate,

I asked him why and what makes him said so?

He then reply nonchalantly,"because even if you give chance to people and expect them to change after that,they'll cleanly forget about it after 10 minutes and remain as baddy or whatsoever you don't wish them to..."

I pondered and thought so that this statement might be very subjective and explicit but it happens all the time rite?

The factors that bring to my mind are,

1. Human are forgetful.
2.We tend to say or promise something that we are not certain of when we
urgently need help.
3.We never ever cherish anything that comes in handy.
4.Believe me,we often get distracted without our noticing.
5.Things can come very spontaneously,unless you are familiar in handling it or
else you'll be dragged away.
6.*fill in yourself please?*

Well,just assume that you are a samaritan that bestowing good deeds will be better off in this case.I mean,why not?Unless that person is just so superior for you and you can't live without him/her.Otherwise,just don't give a damn!Life goes on!What for being so sensitive and at the end of the day only to realise that you are actually putting yourself in a very bad situation.It's all up to you,if you think you should do,go ahead I'll say.However,just ignore it and let it go for your own sake.You not gonna lose a single cent from it.Come on,he/she does not deserves your concern at all.

I bet you should have any other better things to do.Find some ways to enlighten you and save your days.Don't sunk yourself too deep into the well that you don't even know its depth.As my old cliche,find yourself a lifetime target and go for it without single doubt.Ignore all the side-branches that come before you.As long as your will is strong and you know what you are doing.Voila,the target will be achieved by you in real soon!Those targets that I'm referring are things like "ambition","how to be succesful","how to live life to fullest","how to grab hold on your happiness" and stuffs like that.BIG DREAMS is what I mean.Your future is in your own hand anyway.Whatever you do now,bear in mind,will lay down a pavement towards your future goal(s)...Try to weigh what's important to you and what's not.

Life is sacred and you clinch it yourself.

Beautifully Disintegrated

Recently got totally no exams mood at all although it's only few days away.Dunno y or maybe bcos I'd exhausted them during mock times?Ah,beat me lah!For hell reason I'd know like this...Life goes on...the most I'll just "pia" myself to death for the days to come before exam lor!Just how much I'll lose from it huh?The most just flunk the paper...nothing could be worse than that right?On top of that,maybe a passing grade will do?Man,I'm so not gonna believe this...procrastinating!Law is really a subject from hell...I rather stare at a lifeless stone than ploughing thru the legal text book.Just so big turn off for me...I'm by no means sure that this is the right subject I've taken so far!Rather be a victim of Accounting or Further Maths instead...at least can fail with honor.Does it makes sense?Alright,my head is spinning now...*&(&(^#%$^...damn!

Just realised that it's been quite long since the last time I posted any photos.Anyhow,some pics to spice up my boring blog here...


Just another random capture of Bangsar's night scene.Was hoping to get some random sportscars captured under my lens but then turned out to be a shabby lao pok car instead.Yea,a old 80's Honda Civic that patched itself to look like Trueno...yucky man! The very clean-and-artistic-it-seems' junction at Bangsar.That was Terence back that spoilt the effect...damn!

Duh..."fish-eye" overview of the infamous terbengkalai-ed monorail station in college!!!Peace sign on the inoperative monorail station.Was standing on the track back to then.
Was Ms. Wong holding a pail or sumthing?It's actually due to the poor camera quality effect that contributed to this.She was holding a sheet of note I think.lol

Cam whore time!Well,look at the background,it's da ocean of wisdom aka library.So,can guess just how boring to be in the library all day long?

Beat beat beat~!

OH MY GAWDDDDDDD!!!

I almost gave up my diet plan for now...

I ate like machine today!

I woke up at 12 sumthing then Dominic asked to go eat at Paramount.And so couldn't reject the temptation,tagged along.Ate Jawa Mee and almost gobbled up 5 popiahs thanks to Dom. as well.I ordered like 2 popiahs then Dom. pandai-pandai ordered another 3 for us then ended up stuffing yet still gotta da bao away!Man,feel so sinful and guilty after every meal from now...gotta force-vomit myself,bulemia?!!!Can it works anyway?

Then da bao edi no one wanna keep it then all threw to my room and luckily it went rotten and have to throw away!God saved me from that...

After finished studies at library around 10 then kena cajoled to eat supper again,OH MY GAWWWWD!SS2 again,I ate roti telur and ice blended at mamak!!!!!I should specially thank Steph. and Terence for that,u both deserve my credits!Fuck...

Then,someone suggested for joyriding and we juz went all the way to OU then The Curve,Ikea,Ikano.Again,someone came out wif the idea that we should went further to Bangsar...wtf...all the way to Mont Kiara,Hartamas,almost reached downtown then turned back Bangsar and then after that missing in direction then went all the way to MidValley,Sentral,Old Klang road,PJ old town.....there we go,Federal Highway and finally came back to SUnway at 1 sumthing feeling vy guilty again.While gaining weight and feeling upset over failed diet plan for the day,at the same time,procrastinated my revision again and sacrificed my precious sleeping time!Arghhh....my effort has to be paid off somehow due to the stupid times that I spent in library so far...u better gove me atleast 2 A's!

GOod nite!!!

Bad Day

"When it comes to the topic about our country's education system,disappointment is the only words I can conclude..."


Basically,this country has divided the primary school system into mainly 3 mediums,Malay-the sekolah kebangsaan(SK) formerly sekolah rendah kebangsaan,Chinese,Tamil and others-sekolah jenis kebangsaan(SJK) formerly known as sekolah rendah jenis kebangsaan.Thus,all the typical and wise Chinese parents will try their very best to gain an entry for their children to enter the Chinese medium primary school in the light of hoping to give their children the best educaction of all.But the thing is "we have over-sufficient of bowl but it's not enough to accommodate all the rice we have" situation where the number of people designated to this is practically not enough.Yes,I'm talking about the fact that we have only maybe 1 or none Chinese medium primary school in our small community but then the irony is,there are maybe 2 or 3 SK in a community with Chinese majority.This is the thing that happens on me in real life.So,must we be satisfied or thank the government for granting us a stingy amount of one SJK in approx. radius of 100km or maybe more than that?As a true Malaysian,we all know that what's good and what's not as we are not a bunch of dumbass or puppet that constantly manipulate on the state's discretion.Paradoxically and historically,we are and will always be.Trade unions and political parties have tried all their best all the time to request for SJK but then when it reaches to the relevant minister,he/she will simply flick his/her finger and shoo it off,and there goes he/she will continuing boosting the manifesto as how they gonna do to improve our education system,how they wanna let all the citizen to receive good education,how they'll expect the average standard of the performance of the students to increase due to the brilliant reform that made by them and so on.In the end,we shall see the jokes.On the other hand,it's very pitiful for those parents that couldn't find a place for their children to settle down.If they are well off,that won't be any problem as money oriented Private based Schools and International Schools are always gesturing with warm welcome to them.The problem is those family that hardly get their two ends meet will have to seek for alternative way or maybe send their children to a SJK that situated in a further neighbourhood,worse to worse,they'll just have to accept the faith and send them to the neighbourhood's SK which will eventually lead them to misery.On the other senario,people in JB having another better option which is to send their children across the causeway to let their children immerse in one of the world best education system.Ironically,both countries are sitting side by side and used to be as one yet after separation,formed two pronged scenes.Sometimes ago,we used to adopt English medium education due to the influence from British colonial times but in order to show how great and influential of our national language,they abolished it and started off using Malay as medium since then only came to realise that somehow it has flaws anyway and can't be competitive internaltionally somehow.Therefore,dramatically they reformed it within a short period of time and switch back to the English medium based system retrospectively.If only we could just stick to that we would have be having an education system which is in equivalent standard as our southern neigbouring country.While credit is where credit due,indeed,the politicians have make a greatest joke on their citizens.Have we ever noticed that we have been toying all the while and ended up in confusing and obsolescence?Certainly we do but our voices are just so trivial that can be easily bypassed by the ruling party.

For unknown reason,we used to have this "remove" form in every government funded secondary schools that specially and particularly made for those that couldn't get satisfactory result on their Bahasa Melayu and all other subjects or Bahasa Melayu alone.With this,the vast majority ethnic that flooded the remove form's classes were the Chinese and some Indians.While for Malays,they can be automatically graded up to the mainstream,FORM 1.Chinese and Indians all thrown behind then.For now,we are/were unanimously forced to learn things in Malay eventhough for the sciences.And now it has been changed to English but only applicable to science subject.And still,they are tought in broken English because the teachers that teaching all still the same as they are taught in Malay during their time in teacher's college.This is what we called "changing the soup without changing the remedy" where after a big detour will still comes back to the same end.Again,we have so many "used to have" such as the PTS which enable the students that pass the test to leap over from Std. 3 to Std. 5.Somehow,it's not appropriate for an early stage of education to have short cut route.Thus,abolished.Now,rumour has said that PMR,UPSR...are going to be abolished soon as the government wants to adopt British kind of education system(like the one Singapore is having now).As the government has been encouraging the development of science and technology all these years.Students mostly put science stream on the greatest and top priority where if you are from science stream,you are something but if you are not,you are nothing.Multitudes of students are bildfolded and chose science stream only to realise that it's not suitable for them but who to blame?Under our education system,science students are the top students and they'll have it all but the arts and commerce one will left in rotten or theoratically they shall be the hopeless bunch.Eventually,science stream students will look down on the arts stream's and form their own elite's communities to get isolated from other streams students.Now,we are having imbalance of students in different streams.It will leads to a big problem in future.Apart from that,our education system only teaches us to learn from the books but not encouraging real life experiencing at all.In fact,those straight A's students for me are just a bunch of people who can read and memorise diligently but practically they are nothing.For some strange reasons,students that make it to the straight A's,medicine is the only course they'll going to pursue further in future.Why?I don't know "because they say that it can earns more money than the others"...that will be the common phrases that those straight A's candidates will tell u "privately" of course not to the media,of course they will tell the media how they like to study medicine,how they have been inspired,how they feel like they wanted to help the others and yada yada...all craps but their main objective is $.Cut the craps and face the truth!I hate to admit that,as a truly citizen that born in Malaysia and grew up locally.We are treated differently.Our higher institution and public universities are no longer meant for us but predominated but single ethnic.However,we are out of that ethnic and we all know that we can't get any shelter under the public uni. anymore unless we strive hard to get all A's.As for those who can't get I'm sorry either you are granted with an entry but without being able to choose your own course that you interested or none of them that you are actually being left oblivion.You decide yourself anyway.But look,our fellow "bumiputra" friends can easily enter to public uni. without any barrier and still get to choose their favourite courses.The left over will be taken by us.Can our education still be trusted under these circumstances?It could downright destroy the spirit and potential of young Malaysians. How do you expect someone to excel in something that they have no interest in? How do you expect someone who has no formative skills in something to succeed in it? How do you expect a bunch of misplaced students to lead this country in the future?

Well,for those that can afford,they'll be sent to private institution or just wave goodbye to Malaysia and won't ever think of coming back.For me,I'll prefer the latter.I'll will be rather nonchalantly and standoffish of me to say that you're better off to get yourself into the private institution doing what you really want than wasting your time in public uni.You can't force yourself afterall because this is concerning your future.

By all odds,being a by-product of Malaysian education system,I've learnt a lesson from it which I will use up all my strength and energy to work my ass off in order not to let my children follow the same way as I did.I want to give them the best that Malaysia couldn't give me.I have to safeguard their journey and optimism as mine has been torn apart long time ago.

In nutshell,we shall see what's gonna happen in future and how our education gonna encounter the next innovation trend.Somehow,all I know is Malaysian education system can't be able to foster or nurture any brilliant student unless they are gifted and born to be a talented student.Otherwise,they're just a buch of study machine that control over by the desparing and misgoverned education system.

Procrastination

Again feeling laid back after coming back from library so decided to mess up my blog although I've promised that I won't be onlining for the following days but then I feel that I derive a break from my entire hard day.So there's nothing to study for 7-8 hours and online for 3 hours rite? *giggles*

Feeling very dead beat thru out the whole day due to persistently rotting away in the library...now library really sucks...it's not like a library with ISO 9002 cert. at all as all the Sunway Monash students should be knowing very well how "tranquil" the library is most the time.Apparently,it seems more like a busy stock market where ppl juz chatting away in the library with their thunderous voice otherwise talk on phone and blah blah...I'm so fed up with it!But no doubt the collection of books,AV and all sorts of info-medias can say to be up to the standard(well at least it gives them bonus mark besides the downside and save their ISO certified reputation!)...and another thing,it is frigging cold inside the library.Was trembling and shivering without extra garments!Dear Mr and Mrs Librarian or other admin. personnels please liste to my shout out and do something on it lah!

I got a strong intuition that I'll be continued on procrastinating my works but then it's alrite since it's not much to study for Law Paper 2 and Pure Maths. 1 afterall.However,the thing is my brain is like saturated and reached the maximum density where nothing else can squeeze into it...so I was wondering if that's so,how about my law?I need nothing but memorising on this subject(yea,law is nothing but memorising stiffly and the more ability for u to memorise,the more chances to score higher marks,tht's the typical criterion to study law...nothing else could matter!)...so I have to fork out more time to sleep and refresh my brain in order to produce more of grey matter!!!Recharge,recharge,recharge!!!

And then,another depressing thing is my diet plan again failed today as I din obey to my "1 day 2 meals" basis all thanks to Dominic...

It's ok the most I'll be remained in chubby,corpulent and flabiness forever looking like the Michelin(tyre's brand) mascot!Wut!!!!Looks so like a pile of shit or maybe marshmellows or cottons sounds better.Yucks,damn engrossing!I just wanna have myself an average-sized body that I never ever gotten in my life and possible change the exterior that I'm presenting now...it'll be even better to change the "internal" that I'm potraying right now huh!!!Excel and get succeeded in my studies is what most the essential thing that always on my life achievement list.Life is meaningless without goal and target.SO plan urs now ,strive hard and slog ur life away eventhough so that u can really taste the vicissitudes of life and find the real meaning of it...we live for once only afterall!

Hehe!

Will hunt here again...if I got excess of time! :p

If I haven't notice,next week will be the one and only last week before I sit for my AS 1st paper!
Gotta be in big big trouble this time cos I totally lack of this thing called confidence in all my subjects.Time is elapsing so fast until so barely able to catch a breathe of relaxation.
And so,I played badminton yesterday which I'd missed for half a year since last year.Was playing very hard only to realise that my skill has deteriorated for hell fucking reason that I know.As usual my joints,muscles and the entirely hidden parts are aching like hell until I coudn't even wake up on time this morning.Have to admit that I'm aging now and it's even worse that I can hardly walk and sit straight cos every posture seems uncomfortable to me other than lying flat.Therefore,took nap again(-_-) and procrastinated all the studies that I'm suppose to do today.
So long my revision is in lax,I'll never ever gotta finish off all the chapters before the 16th of May.That will be the freaking Law paper.
The only thing I wish now is to gain the persistent will to keep me going on until the 2nd of June.Or else I'll be finished off the AS exam with deep remorse and be a bad candidate-to-be thereby counting down the days where I'll be collecting my shamefully "pass-only" result!Tht's why I hate to attend the boh-liao lamey premature Graduation Day given the fact that I still got 1 more freaking sem(A2) to go...what for graduate?Cutting cost so that the A-Levels board don't have to waste so much money on each and every intake's students?Why not the board organises a studioussex party instead since A-levels are ever renowned with plentiful of study freaks and nerds?Fuck off...Means I gotta come all the way back to college amid of my holiday break to attend this effing bewildered "graduation" ceremony which specially meant for all of us that still don't know wtf is happening!grrrrhhhh.... *clinch fists*

Now,I have to think what "formal" attire to put on for the coming event.Damn I hate to wear formal wears like leather shoes,long sleeved shirt and then tie.It's like an Oh-My-Gawdd combination for me.Cos I can't believe that I seriously gotta put on these uncle-ish wearing together with my childish look.It's a no-no and so wrong on me!I'll be much more appreciated if only they allow me to wear on a mascot instead...maybe the KFC chicky mascot or those charaters from the Sesame Street....haha....I think Barney might suits me the best right? -_- at least I won't feel worse off with my face in disguise.

Cut the craps,gotta be SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEriuosly study now!And next week I won't be onlining.If got probably at night or when I'm free but that's almost impossible at the coming "red-alert" week.So see ya after my AS...chaoZ!

Mishap!

Went for my 2nd flute class lesson today and everything went pretty smooth as today I did finished the target I set to revise...until some flaws that really spoilt my day and left me in guiltiness!

"...was coming back from SS15 after dinner and went to library to catch up another few chapters before the library call it a day.Then,when the time's-up bell rand,we then headed back and I managed to tag along with Stephanie cos she'll be driving pass the Monash Condo side gate.Therefore,my laziness alter ego has played its part of stopping me from taking a sweet walk from college back to hostel.It is all due to the over-stuffing of "Dinner Plate" that contributes to part of my indolence too(damn it).Moving on,when her car about to reach Lagoonview's gate and just at the moment the car stucked in the traffic-light's queue.In consideration of dear Stephanie's hardship of dropping me off at Monash Condo side gate,I pretentiously decided to let her drop me in the mid. of car queing instead(it's in the middle of the road and kinda adjacent to the road shoulder from our position).And so,I've make a divine estimation that there aren't any cars and motorbikes around and assume that the traffic condition there was quite innocuous all the while...there goes...I opened the door and out of sudden realised that there's a guy in black on a motorbike rode pass and by the time I came into sense,the car door has knocked the poor motorbike rider off the bike and he fell hard along with his motor to the road.Part of his motor were damaged as a result from this.I was astounded and without hesitating,I approached him and flooded him with words of apologetic,of cos have to offer him any compensation or at least offer him external-use medicines since my room is few stones throw away(although kinda broke and on saving budget thru out this month).Somehow,all I could see is his panicky expression and he won't even bother to give me any well-I'm fine-I'm-OK to ease my anxiety over him.But fortunately while he was busying scrutinizing his motorbike and some minor injuries on his hand,he did nod his head along with hushed voice of "I'm fine!" + can-you-leave-me-alone-and-fuck-off-I-dun-wanna-see-you-again look.Luckily,he's Chinese(our college student) and not too aggresive(can't recall his look somehow) .If it's those kinda Ah Beng/Mat Rempit gang,I'll be ended up in the nearest Sunway Medical Centre at this time.Once again,to make sure that guy is alrite,I asked him again whether I can offer any aids for him and I mean it cos I'm the one who in wrong at the first place.Anyhow,he just shook me off with frowny but hidden-anger expression(he juz dun wanna make a "fuss" over this...maybe he knew that I can't help either?!).Whatsoever.Since my few attempts failed,and judging that he still in good condition juz that his shabby motor has already suffer from damages over this.I just went back to my room straight away before more people can be able to realise this.Gosh,if any of my hostel mates saw this and broadcast it to the whole college.SyUC won't be a nice place for me to stay on any longer then,lol!Luckily,at that moment only few cars witnessed this(I assume is those nite class students which the possibility will bump into them in day time at college will be only 0.00001) cos it's quite late and dark already!Phew...The next thing came into my mind was Stephanie's little MyVi,there are few minor scratches embedded into the car door's edge and since Steph. has been very concerned about this kinda issue all the time,thereby,I feel so extremely sorry and guilty for her as well as the anonymous motor rider...Miane/Gomenasai Stephanie!!!If you need compensation juz tell me anytime directly...it's all my fault that leads to this stage....!"

PS : There's a sudden rush of guiltiness on me again constantly...I feel really sorry...Steph.!Issit alrite for me to sing Madonna's SORRY to express my deepest remorseful?!haha... :P

PPS:It's a sad thing that my dieting plan hasn't turn out to be very successful lately due to my incontinence.But they I did cut down my daily meals to 2 ONLY!!!From what I used to have,probably,3 minors + 2 majors + supper unevenly...!It's damn torturing for all I can say!Now that Ern Hao has passed away,and my parents started to having this kinda phobia that if I'm not gonna watch my diet,I'll be following my godsis' footstep soon!How exaggerated it is rite?It's like 2 independent case which unrelated at all...hmm...and the thing is they keep on pestering me to go for gym(yea FF!),so repugnant huh!Last time I voluntarily requested to join but was rejected and yet now they keep forcing me to join instead.Well,I'll be joing later only if there're having some sort of cut-price promotion again such as free registration.

No one special...

Got really exhausted on my inspiration and feeling to blog...

As time goes by,it's becoming worse!!!

Well,just make this post to ensure my blog is well-updated :p

Nothing interesting happens recently,it's all about study and hiding in a little corner of library...nerd away into books!Esp Econs...the killer subject with cobweb-shaped-barely-understandable-watsoever graphs and datas!See?! *frown*...anything else better to enlighten me?

M:I:III shown on today but faith is not on my side afterall since we've already made agreement of not to go for movie for unlimited period until the end of AS exams.Gosh!Why MI3 came at this very time!And also The Da Vincci Code too came at the wrong time!Have to catch up with the DVD later....!

To those that happen to read this post,stop cajoling me to commit in similar kinda activities!!!I'm kinda amid of abstinence now can? *

AS here I come...T.T...you'll be defeated by my MARVELLOUS results somehow!Buahahahah!!!!!

Now,i'm heading to the library(monastery) without failing on daily basis hope to achieve to the level of nirvana somehow!!!Here I come...

Oh yea did any one told you all that I'm a total procrastinator?

Buahaha,watcha expect for?

*cue music of war plus some drum rolls*

Tada!For this time I swear,Law paper 2 falls on 16th May which is practically 13 days away only!What a judgement day to come!God bless my through thick and thin...oh yea the most important will be the 17th paper of Pure Math 1,if I ever got bad grade (below B and distinction)...someone can just hand me a sharp and instantly effective dagger/razor/sharp-blade knife in order to let me end my life as soon as possible yet at the same time retain my charming look.Jump off from high storeys may died hideously and all the brain pulps will splash to everywhere...so gross! *like-I-care-! expression*

~~~~~~~~~~

p/s: ppl out there stop making fool on urself anticipating the 01 02 03 04 05 06
Although it might seems to be a vy special day and sort of thousand-years-for-once but don'tcha have other things better to do than making fun of numerical to save ur day only to know that it'll only occurs in an interval of " 1 second "...wtf tight?I'm so enraged when I saw the media keep on publishing things related to this...it's only a trivial matter afterall.On the other hand,I can celebrate each days if I'm feel happy to do so right?Since everyday occurs only once-in-a-lifetime...!I guess I have to celebrate for today too cos this is da ONE AND ONLY "03-05-2006"...does it makes sense too?It's reciprocal mah afterall?! *roll eyes then snorts*

Ok a bit siao siao today maybe due to severely over-studied disease...chaoZ!

It's over

Finally,the funeral was over yesterday and right after that I came back to KL immediately.Managed to catch some rest cos I'd not been sleeping since Tuesday and it went on Wednesday midnight where few of us including me have to watch over the altar overnight although I accidentally fell asleep for an hour but ended up with many mosquito bites.The funeral was very mournful and full of sorrow.Although my godma seems to acting very strong but at times she would be dazed with teary eyes.Therefore,we were trying our very best to cheer her up by keep on talking to her.As for my godpa,he seems more agitated and sadder apparently and through out the whole ceromony,he was weeping or if not,teary red eyes.Nevertheless,they both looked haggard and tired.It's like my heart have been torn into million of pieces and burst into tears whenever seeing them in this state.Heaven has made a greatest joke on them!

During the whole night,my heart was puzzled and seems that most of us are unwilling to accept her death or at least couldn't believe what has happened in front of them.It happened too fast.When I peered into the coffin,I was really astounded and couldn't believe my own eyes.Is she the godsis/cousin I used to have lying lifeless inside?Is she the ever gentle,polite,kind and chatty godsis/cousin I used to have?Why was she lying inside and her look almost deformed...again I couldn't help but cried pointlessly!She was only so young...should we accept and compromise to the statement that this is all predestinated?

And yesterday morning,all of us chanted matra for her one last time to make our last tribute for her.Then,they called me and my godbro to make offering to her one last time before they sealed the coffin.That moment really is really the worst in my life.Then the coffin was brought to a van and sent to the cremation room followed my the mourning team behind.Where we chanted mantra once again and then watched the coffin went into the cremation furnace helplessly and the worse add on was we were advised not to cry during that moment in order to let her soul go peacefully and able to rest in peace.Both her parents were not being allowed to present at the cremation ceromony due to some superstitious belief.And all the elderly and older generation had to stand behind too...and the cruellest thing is I was told to stand at the most front position.I was trying my very best to hold back my tears but I keep on hearing my relatives sniveling behind me and couldn't control but dropped some tears while holding the joss stick.

Now that all has over.And I think Ern Hao will be rest in peace in Heaven and standing by the buddhas side.We assume that she's happy now.One thing to affirm,she will live in our heart always and forever,and we will always remember we used to have this good and nice Ern Hao as one of our family members.

This time around,I have to suppress my sorrow and resume my revisions again.Time to gambate once again...

~It's over now~

In loving memory of a bright young girl...

Just received a bad news on this early morning,

Ern Hao left us peacefully at 5.00 am,

She don't have to suffer any longer and she's probably somewhere in heaven by the buddhas' side watching at us and bless us for what we're doing,maybe a fairy?

Of course I'll say that she's qualified to be a fairy given that she's a gentle,soft-spoken,polite,temper-less and kind girl we used to have.

Hope she can rest in peace.Maybe she had found a better way for her and also for us.

Maybe that's the reason that I can't cry at all so far since this morning,I cried for several times last week when heard that her condition is getting worse and worse each day.I don't know,I feel very helpless and I actually puzzled when I received this mishap his morning.My mind was confusing and it all happened in such rapid of time where I still remember few months back where we were still having fun and chatting.Now,I don't know what to do,to cry or not to?It's so messy...

Maybe I should call up papa later to send him my deepest condolence before I go back to attend her funeral.I hate to see this...!

Why her life ended so fast and in fact she's only in her sweet 22,she haven't even live her life to fullest.It's only a quarter of her lifespan,now,her dream and fantasy just eliminate follow by her departure...she could have dreamt of having a once-in-life-time wedding gown on just like all other girls fantasizing.She may pursue further to have a complete and blissful family with kids...However,it all went off like bubbles,vanish into the thin air.I hope she won't felt regret about having all of us as her family and relatives.The most essential thing is that she can leave peacefully without anything left behind...although there are so many things undone for her!

Once again,

You will always in our remembrance no matter how,just wanna let you know that we love you and you'll never ever walking alone.

Now,you have gone to a faraway place.In fact a place that we'll all have to go one day,despite,you are there sooner than us.

REST IN PEACE

~In our loving memory of Lim Ern Ho (1984-2006) ~

Life and Dealth

Just receive some bad news from JB saying that this 2 days will be the crucial period for Ern Hao to either survive or ...leave all of us.

Cos she's unable to discharge her urine due to kidney failure(yea,the virus has spread to her kidney now causing it to be malfunctioned).But they said that further diagnosis need to be taken prior to this conclusion.OMG!

Basically the doctor said,this 2 days are exceptionally important to determine whether she can be able to continue ahead her still-long-and-sweet's journey of life.So,this 2 days is very dangerous for her.In a nutshell,she could have just leave us at every second from now on until the end of 2 days or well,it's hard to say too as this kinda thing is beyond any prediction and expectation...it's uncertainty.For us we can't do anything but pray for every single second that she may recover soon and have fun with us once again like before...really helpless and depressing.

Here's some details of TB found from Wikipedia :

~TB (short for tuberculosis and also for Tubercle Bacillus)

~Tuberculosis (commonly shortened to TB) is an infection caused by the bacterium Mycobacterium tuberculosis, which most commonly affects the lungs (pulmonary TB) but can also affect the central nervous system (meningitis), lymphatic system, circulatory system (Miliary tuberculosis), genitourinary system(this is why she failed to discharge her toxics through urinary system due to kidney's failure), bones and joints.

Tuberculosis is one of the most deadly and common major infectious diseases today, infecting two billion people, or approximately one-third ( WHO TB.) of the world's population. Nine million new cases of the disease, resulting in two million deaths, occur annually, mostly in developing countries. However, developed countries are not spared the burden of tuberculosis. There is a rising number of people in the developed world who contract tuberculosis because they have compromised immune systems, typically as a result of immunosupressive drugs or HIV/AIDS. These people are at particular risk of tuberculosis infection and active tuberculosis disease.

Most of those infected (90%) have asymptomatic latent TB infection (LTBI). There is a 10% lifetime chance that LTBI will progress to TB disease which, if left untreated, will kill more than 50% of its victims. TB is one of the top four infectious killing diseases in the world: TB kills 2 million, and malaria kills 1 million.

The neglect of TB control programs, HIV/AIDS, and immigration has caused a resurgence of tuberculosis. Multiple drug resistant strains of TB (MDR-TB) and Extreme Drug-Resistance in Tuberculosis (XDR-TB) are emerging. The World Health Organization declared TB a global health emergency in 1993, and the Stop TB Partnership proposed a Global Plan to Stop Tuberculosis which aims to save an additional 14 million lives between 2006 and 2015.

Flame again...

Once again,

That piece of confusion in my mind has flamed itself out of nowhere...

I'm started to feeling miserable for my future prospect again.No no!It's not yet reaching the stage of choosing a job whatsoever but what to study after accomplished my very Pre-U studies(of cos with result above credit and falls somewhere in distinction :p).LOL,it's a must however...

Moving on,

Then,no matter how,still gotta continue with my degree studies after A-Levels.If you still haven't come into sense,that's the greatest and only thing I've been worrying about so far after SPM...shame on me!I'm a ever-loser when it comes to the time to make some big decision.

Yes,whatever,life goes on!

I found some courses description from Uni. of Toronto(Canada) yesterday and found quite a few not-a-bad-deal's courses which sounds somewhat "appealing" to me,here they are:

Science:
1. BioInformatic and Computational Biology
2.Life Sciences(major in Toxicology)
3.Environmental Studies(Chemistry option)
4.Psychology

Business and Commerce:
1.Actuarial Science
2.Economics

Ok,although people may have doubt that given I'm in the art stream currently but I'll most probably going to take up American Degree Prog. once again after my A-Levels studies.That will be the most economical and less time consuming way of "migrating" back to the sweet nest of sciences.I won't allow myself to start all over again by resiting any shorter Pre-U studies like CIMP,AUSMAT,MUFY,SAM,ICPU...although they need only one year but it just doesn't sounds right for me and wasted all that what I've been done in A-Levels.ADP is the last resort...

As for Actuarial Science,it might seems impossible for me to venture into that but I can't deby that everything has its possibility.I know it's tough for this course but since it touches on Statistics and Probability/Calculus,it won't bother me too much given that I've already experienced all that subjects in my life.Calculus may be a nightmare without motivation and continuous effort but it's not hard to get both of them afterall right?

On the other hand,Economics is the bestest arts subject I've been encountered so far in my miserable life of A-Levels.Since once again,it really no way to be excluded from the fate of linking itself with Calculus.I'll have to compromise and accept the challenges from Calculus...I can't escape from the fact that it really very important in N.American education system!

That's my latest update of degree options.Later will have to have a family conference again to tell my parents about the outcome.

Headache...*smack forehead*

Overjoyed when the dead end has yet to reach...

First and foremost,I have to express my deeply contriteness for not doing any study today where I'm suppose to do so given that my AS is around the corner.In addition,I think I have quite a lot of tutorial to rush for in order to pass up on or before the due date.Now,look at me,I didn't have any one of them done so far.It hit me hard when come to realise that today is already Sunday,3 more weeks for AS(no more mock this time,die means die...).Gosh,I'm damn sinful now for being not study at all yesterday.Punish me please for god's sake so that I can get good result for AS!!!I'll do anything as long as I can repay and amend it...

...it also reminds me that I shouldn't take any fast food anymore.These few days were all about McD,KFC,LongJohn,Pizza...*pukes*...!Tell me there're still good and nice food on earth please.I miss seafood,I miss laksa,I miss Egg Tart...KL's foods sucks except for Mdm. Kwan!Now,the worst food on earth is PizzaHut,I used to love cheezy stuff very much but once I ate PizzaHut and after that Cheeze will be a forbidden for few months...that kinda over-filling and sickish symptom after eting PizzaHut really freaks me out for that deserved long period.Unfortunately,I can't stop puking whenever PizzaHut or Mamak comes into my mind,not forgetting the foods around SYUC...

Apparently,I thought watching a couple of movie might be able to relief some exam's tension.In fact,not at all.It's more of negative effects...watched "Ultraviolet" last few days.At first,I thought,wow!That'll be cool watching Milla Jovovich in actions,where hoping that it might be something like Resident Evil,Aeon Flux,Underworld...again...a greatest joke on earth.Pls dun be blindfolded by their trailer or any of their "cool"poster...it's just another nice marketing strategy only!The fact is that the movie was over exaggerating and surreal which more of things like animation.Imagine a sexy girl fight against 700 fully armoured army troops and her weapons are all hiding inside her body invisibly,the worst is they're unexhaustable.Bah...!Wasting my time and cost me a warning letter from hostel management.But no doubt,Milla looks even sexier when she's transformed into some kinda "utraviolet" theme of attire along with light purple hair.That really saves my day...in fact one of the scene when she's riding a hightechy chopper(or maybe is motorbike) while racing off the street with stunning actions,coincidently,it really looks like the one in Ayu's Startin's PV.In fact the similarity is almost 99.99%.Maybe that's the reason that makes it worthwhile for the tic. :p

...Watched a very lame cartoon movie "The Wild".I feel that I'm a bit childish after watching that show.Not much of ooh-aah despite some excessive idiotic/lamey funny scenes which doesn't makes sense at all...*sigh*...Disney,shame on you!We need things like Pocahontas,Monster Inc. and yada-yada once more.Can we?

I've been wasting a lot of time now...Sunday will be the time for me to rush for all my tutorials and studies or else I'll be perished.

Oh ya,I heard that my grandpa fell down last few days and had some stitches of 12.Hope nothing further will happen cos he's already in his 101!And also Ern Hao still hardly got any progression and recovery so far that has been 2 weeks since she's lying in critical condition.

Let's pray for them and me as well once more...

Hopeless

So I was wondering what to do for this weekend...

...

Well,basically it's like practically nothing at all.

The anticipated flute class had cancelled for unknown reason and in fact that's suppose to be out 1st lesson.

A stack of books on my desk which really taken most my time.Now they're calling me again...

Everyday gotta eat at the same place and similar food.

Suffering from the adverse side-effects that persistently contribute by the ever-yellowish highly polluted hostel's water.

Mood-O-meter hitting the lowest point.Seriouly,nothing can turn me up accept for someone that can come and tell me,"hey,terrorists bomb SYUC and there's nothing but the few huge pillars left...".Of cos they can't bomb the hostel cos I'm HERE!

JUz received a warning letter from the hostel management becos of I came back late(1:27 am) on Thursday(breached one of the regulation states in the contract?!bummer...).Somehow,I feel nothing wrong to blame cos I juz happened to watch a midnight movie in Pyramid and came back right after that.Stupid security guards and Mr. Tan(lamest on earth).If only I can take over the management rights one day,I'll have the curfew lifted!Pointless...kick me out anytime if u feel like doing so!

Of late,have been spending time working out the Photoshop and Illustrator,hope to do something surreal yet artistic digital artwork.Below's are few of my beginner level's "masterpiece"...kinda pointless anyway but I like it!

*yawn*

Time to hit the bed for a nap cos hardly slept for the past few days and finally we finished off our Moral presentation.But we have Moral exam coming soon...arghhh!

Tell me life is full of hopes please T.T

Life in mono - mono

The stranger sang a theme,
From someone else's dream
The leaves began to fall
And no one spoke at all
But I can't seem to recall
When you came along

Ingenue,
Ingenue,
I just don't know what to do

The tree-lined avenue
Begins to fade from view
Drowning past regrets
In tea and cigarettes
But I can't seem to forget
When you came along

Shattered...

Will my life be any diffrence from now on?
What does the future hold?
What am I living my days for?
Have I ever achieve anything greatest in life?

For me...

The story just left unknown...

Utter disappointed and perished!

It's just so utterly disappointed and depressing...

Screwed up my Pure Maths. 1 like hell,it's like the REAL hell.And the things that spread salt to the wound is that I actually re-do all the question far before I get back my result and discovered that,it's all easy peasy questions,c'mon Form 5 standard only k?!!!I was so stimulate and sensitive of this "form 5" words,as if people might think it's a shame to do bad given that it's only "form 5" standard.Screw u,u think I got that kinda time to revise back all the SPM Add. Maths. book issit?

But I admit it's kinda shame too but that doesn't mean that I'll do bad for the rest of that.It's only once-and-for-all!!!My exam skills sucks,I hate to do thing with time limit and spontaneouly.I need time...

Well,maybe my mental processing is a bit "torpid" but doesn't mean that I'm a dumbass.I hate generalisation...It sucks!

Give me time,I'll prove u wrong SOON!

On the other hand,

Case 1:
I'm a bit disappointed for Law too as I misunderstood 2 essay questions where I left out the whole part that the question require me to write at the beginning.I concentrated at the 2nd part only cos I thought the question requires only the 2nd part.

Case 2:
The other one is I for nothing add in additional yet unwanted points to my essay to prolong the length but in fact the question didn't requires me to do so...why I'm so confident then?Fuck up...I thought they need those points which stated in the question!Damn confusing...

I'm fucking paradox...

Econs.
MCQ still quite satisfy overall.But then I actually draw the wrong diagram(DD/SS graph) and misinterpret it...there goes my precious marks that will lead me to a distinction grade T.T

As for the essays part,things aren't going that well too due to my under-length essay answers.My mind was in total blank slate that time and I squeezed all my grey matter still couldn't think of any good points for that.Cos none of them in our class knows how to write that question.For me,I dunno why the hell would I chose that question out of 3 questions given...so damn bummer and annoying now!I totally didn't put hope on the essays section AT ALL right after I finish that paper!I'm waiting and expectng for the worst scenario to come...

Wish me good luck then...!

~There's still hardly any progression and recovery on my TB affected's cousin sis. as the days go by,we are getting more worry.When can she wake up and talk to us again,and when can she be free from critical condition's period?This answer yet no one can tell,only the heaven knows...we just gonna continue to pray for her everyday and wish for a speedy recovery.God bless her~!

After so many mishaps and incidents,I thought finally might be able to put my heart on AS revision,fat hope it is indeed,Moral Studies are like unceasingly pestering us again after resting for a week during mock exam time.Now again,our preparation for the coming presentation on this Thursday resume.In such a short of time,we are forced to do so many things like preparing slide show,additional notes to present,wat to wear during presentation,how to compile all our files that we do seperately at first,how to add on decoration for the things that going to present and you name it!!!Like tonnes of mountain of jobs gesturing and waving to us...pui!Sien lor!

Now,the only option,vision,destination or whatsoever for me is to do well in my AS.Hence,I need super sufficient of time to struggle for last minute's preparation(4 more weeks to go @.@~).So,do u think I got the time to bother about the annoying's Moral Presentation.My ass of cos not,I'll just simply cover up my tasks for Moral Studies without giving it a fucking damn.I'd done my part,the rest is up 2 u all.I don't care for any decoration thingy,tactic of presenting in order to win the spectators' heart,how loud of volume should I adjust to my voice and whatsoever.It's all pointless of doings where the lecturer will just care about whether to pass u or not?So,it's a matter of to past or not to rite?Just pass it decently is enough I think given that we're really lack of time at this very moment!Who cares a lot of that presentation now?Whatever will be,will be...

Fight for victory in AS is what most the right thing we should do now.No time for others bcos afterall "success is my only mother-fucking option"... (quoted from Terence :p )

PS:Seriously dun hav much time left now,so really hav to cut down my blogging amount here.No kidding man.Again,not much time left,please be serious and concerned about this matter...

Time's (almost) up!

~~study(hard) mode ON~~

Along with full-tanked fighting spirit!!!!

Against all odds,brave the evil,overcome yourself!

It's been a week since Ern Hao admitted hospital lying in coma...

There isn't any progression so far which really makes all of us so much in anxiety and desperation.

As what human nature tells,I've been covered my face with tears for several times so far (in dark...).I think I haven't been crying since after my primary 6 until now,I can't hold back my tears anymore when think of the worst scenario that'll happen.

My Papa and Mama in J.B. are so desperate and upset now as I could hear during our conversation the phone yesterday.I couldn't even bring myself to talk any longer to them as I just don't wish to weep in front of them due to the purpose of that call I'd made.I suppose to give them encouragement and moral support to tell them to look on the bright side where things gonna be alright soon,if I cry,for sure the consequences wouldn't be just what I'm planning of...But soon after I hung up the phone,I cried like no one else and who says guy shouldn't cry (although I'm bigger in size than the usual one)!I'm made of flesh and blood along with emotional implanted ok?

I totally mood-less for these few days after I heard this bad news.

And today,

things getting not that well as my mum called up to tell us that the doctor had already said that the situation is going to be bad and not what we've been expecting for so far...she had just gone through an operation this morning and the doctor advised us to be prepared for the worst because the chances for her to life are getting lesser.The conclusion is made right after the operation...it really dampens our spirit heavily once again!Before that her heart has stopped to beat for twice but fortunately saved by the doctor...

Now,we can't do anything but pray hard for her...

Hope that she can recover and give us some response...

At this moment,my feeling is very complicated,I'm very afraid of any telephone ring or phone call from JB.They're just so undesireable at this very moment...

Each time the phone ring,our heartbeat go faster and we gotta take deep breath in order to answer the call...

It's torturing but it can't be compared to my dearest godsis that lying on the bed fighting with the disease(it's Tibi,which sounds very rare in our country as this sickness often happens in the poorer country.Now we all suspect that maybe she was iinfected during the time when she was working as a tourist guide where she had many close contact with foreigners.)

Now,I feel that the day has passes in too slow of pace.

Time seems to stop and refuse to move any further.

We are very desperate at this moment too which lead us to strong anxiety.We don't even dare to tell my Papa and Mama the outcome of the operation by doctor.

We left them room for hopes.So as we.

~God bless Ern Hao against every bad things~

Hope there will be good news and progression tomorrow.

Nitez~

Please be strong and keep your life going...

*Pls be solemn*

Called my mum just now and received a very shocking unfortunately news from them :

ERN HAO (my dear cousin sister cum my god sister)

She's admitted hospital for contracting Tibi and saying that it's already 3rd stage.The chances to live is only 50 : 50 ...

I was totally stunned for 5 minutes or more,tears almost burst out...

Her respiratory system doesn't function well now and in aid of the respiratory machine(<---forgot what's the name for it).

She's warded in Johor Specialist now,the medical fees are bound to be exorbitant by the way from what I heard,4 days Rm30 000 spent!

She seems so well during CNY despite looking haggard.She's a devoted buddhist,soft spoken,gentle,hardworking,well-manner and filial girl.Infact,she's the most for those among all our cousins...

Why should thing like this happens on such a good girl?I know this is life and heaven's will but why don't this thing happens on all the bad people out there instead of this harmless girl here?

It's just so unfair and absurd...

I don't wish to see any bad thing happens to my closest friends and relatives at this moment and even forever if possible.It's better that I depart first than experiencing that kinda pain on losing them one after another.

I don't believe in faith and destiny somehow that determine this,life is in our own hand and only we ourselves know how to handle it at its best.

So,Ern Hao,please be strong.Establish your will to live on.Don't let Papa,Mama,Ern Sien,Ah Bao,Ah Wen gogo,Ah Mah and all the relatives down because no matter how we will stay by your side.You not gonna lose us,neither we gonna lose you.

We will pray for your recovery at every moment.Please do us a flavour,fight against the disease and those undesired things that dampen your will!Please do that...!

You still gotta move to your new house(very much near to my present residential area),and I'm very looking forward to hangout at your new house...

And that's not even enough,we still gonna gamble with you on the next CNY and win all your money...But if you promise to overcome yourself,we'll let you be the winner for 10 consecutive CNY!And so do mahjong...

Just promise us that you will be strong and don't give up!

PS : My mum say that all of us that having close contact with Ern Hao will have to undergo medical check up soon to ensure that we are all safe.PREVENTION IS BETTER THAN CURE.People please go for check up once you knew that something not right on you even if it's very insignificant.Like the case of my godsister,the doctor diagnosed that she's been having the disease in her lung since last year when it's still in early stage and she did experiencing persistent coughing for quite some time but she didn't seek for a licensed and qualified professional doctor instead of Chinese SinSeh and took the traditional remedy.This is a wrongful example which can't be rely on,Chinese traditional herbs are mostly not scientifically proven to be effective.Any problem please go for the Clinic or Hospital before it's too late...

I just happen to realise that life is so vulnerable and unpredictable,cherish it...

Today is a day,tomorrow still a day.

Haiz...just here to release some tension!
.
.
.
.
.
Aiya,no need to say lah!Sure know wat happens rite?
.
.
.
What else can it be other than the mock exam?

Prettey much disappointed and depressing lor...as how would u feel if those question u thought are very important usually fail to present in front u when u browsing through ur exam's sheet?

and

When u know u can do it but realise u did wrong after the exam,they were just a trivial error!C'mon man what can be more easier than MCQ question.Furthermore,those MCQ questions were like derived from the past year papers which u happens to do tonnes of times edi!!!

Fuck!

U know u did tht question before but u still got the ans. wrong...this happened on about 5 MCQ questions from my Econs 1 paper...

Law is another fuck up paper,where the lecturer tht set the paper got no more idea and creativity tht they desperately duplicate the whole latest GCE Exam's Law AS paper 2 without any single modification on the questions!And my lecturer even discussed it wif us during the last week b4 study break!But too bad he didn't gave us the ans exactly...and me as usual how could I resist the lure to doze off in law class when ever single words came out from my lecturer sounds like lullaby?It's so crappy and dumb enough to let go such a big fat chance!!!

Mind you!Law paper 1 has to write 3 essays in 1 and 1/2 hours is bullshitcrapping not enough(the worse was that there's a one or two questions where I wrote has some tendency of getting out of point which leads to the narrow "bandwidth" of my marks! T_T )

However,Law paper 2 data response 2 Qs choose 1Q to do in 1 and 1/2 hours also was shitty mad hell lotsa extra time like 45 minutes!!!It's like 2 extreme kinda situations...tht's y sometimes I really doubt the A-levels' Law standard,the others so far have been quite ok though...exp for this very odd's LAW paper!Hell...

I'm a bit sien now...esp. my beloved Econs' easiet paper,da MCQ paper 1!It's completely totally careless mistakes for all the question tht got wrong...it's damn basic question!!!I'm seriously sick!Damn!

Tomorrow,seriously gotta perish cos I'll be sitting for Econs 2 (data response and essays) which require to write very knowledged-ful and technical points!And relate it to many things to form a cob-web relationship,damn complex things tht can actually exhaust all my grey-matter in one time!Die lor...

The one that can score most already doom and perish!What else should I looking forward to this time?

I totally give up on MOCK as I hope to do better in my AS mock!Atleast a distinction enough!!!

PS:I strongly condemn those lecturer tht gave tips for exam,they really spoilt the student and creating more and more lazy bums here!!!Study all the topics lah!Pot-luck-ed Cambridge GCE exam not gonna give u any tips afterall!So what if ur mock is good but sucks in the actual one?Pointless shit!

Alrite,I still got a month away from my actual AS exam...so really seriously definitely totally utterly have to buck up this time study,revise,practice all over and over again non-stop!!!No more fooling around!

Afterall,this is future defining matter!!!

Fockyordorde...

..........

Today P1 mock kena screwed up like hell man!

Die,will only expect to get 20/75 watsoever (tht'll be maximum...).

S1 is still consider ok despite some careless mistakes which can still be amended b4 the actual AS exam,hah,afterall "it's only mock ward"!Who cares rights?Fuck off...

Suppose to spend whole day in library to study my very law,but then after seeing the whole stack of notes and books before me,KO man!...Give me a break,better go back to my room and get some rest then,to be continued tonight...

This time must do my very best for law provided that there's a possibility to flunk my P1 paper(eventhough can still gain back a little bit from S1 but P1 carries higher weightage than S1...T.T )

So,the whole point is that have to remedy this big flaw through my coming Law and Economics paper on next week!Gambate!Buck up...study hard and smart!

P.S: Maths is just so important that its usage is very wide since it's amphibious in both Science and Arts stream.Seriouly,if I did adequately well(at least a higher "C" or a "B"),I might have the chance(at least I have the qualification to ask for it,if not,I can only dream about it and never ever get to expect my dad to nod his head,not at all k?!) to request for going back to science stream again in future.Therefore,in nutshell,Maths is very much important to me compare to Econs,let alone the already-lost-interest's Law.So frustrate now,worse to worse,may have to re-plan my and re-patch my future pathway again.Damn headache now and moody!God must bless me and I shall no matter how at anytime anywhere believe in myself to the fullest...

It's been quite depress this past few weeks especially over the everlasting pre-exam's phobia and MY VERY INCONSIDERATE ROOMMATE AND HIS VERY FRIEND.

Here's my 10 cents of thought for my roommie(u worth 10 cents only,I think...):

• Have I acted not obvious enough that I'm expecting an major exam in few weeks of time lately?
• I pasted both my mock and AS examination time tables on my wall for so long,are you that blind enough until you seriously neglected that?And I thought u'd asked me before when is my exam,right?Should I repeat over and over again for your forgetfulness?
• Last 2 days when you invited your very friend come over to play your very game and I was studying that time but I'm surprised that you actually asked me,"U can concentrate"?Hah,obvioulsy,you knew it yourself that the answer is definitely NO,not even a single lines of words got into my brain!Let's see if it's in your case then,can you concentrate by the way?Under the affection of full volume/bass blasting gaming sounds and your ever-annoying hoarsely lame laughing with your childish friend.You can never make it through anyway.So obviously,that question you asked me is totally rubbish.
• And please don't pretend that you don't know that I refilled the water dispenser.Since you are the one who fixed the big water bottle into the dispenser all the time when I pretend not to put it into the water bottle until you mention and paid.I thought you are filthy rich enough that a ciplak RM400++ watch bought from KLCC seems so cheap and trivial to you,and,hey!you got a car right,and your parents are all the "1st tier" standard's engineers,ain't them?
• To be honest,you stink like no one else.Please try to change your boxer more often,buy more of it since you are rich!Cos I always seen you wearing the same boxer all the time.It really fills the room with odourness.Wasted my money to buy air freshener all the while man!
• Please lah!If you don't wanna take good care of your very carpet then just roll it up and throw it away.It attracts dusts and dirts.What's the use of your vacuum cleaner then?I'd try to clean up for you few times but not anymore in future since you are not a handicap,but I am,I'm so handicapped when it comes to things related to you!
• Please should I mat a red carpet pathway to invite your very friend out of the room when It's in late night,what the hell man,do you think for a stranger to stay inside my private space at this odd hour will makes me more happy?...it's worse that I'm having exam now!I don't wanna go for a single room cos it's pricey and I think you are the one should go,so that you can fuck your friend inside without others awareness!
• Hey man,look at you,already 22 but only in your very First Year of Uni...I still thought that you are 12 or 13...well maybe 15 sounds better!Can you behave like an adult?You look stupid until I can't stand any longer...you sucks!Maybe you can crowned yourself in the Malaysian Book of Record under the category of the Most Stupidest Man Ever Appear in Malaysia!*cheers*.Oh ya,maybe your very friend should have taken that,cos he looks more stupider than you,like King Kong or Bigfoot(choose either one you in favour of...which sounds better to you?!).Too bad,he's an Indon lah!Ngentot!
• I don't know what the hell you will do except for freezing idly in front of your lappy playing games along with full volume blasting which can be eardrum-explodable!I tell you seriouly from what I've seen from my other friends that studying Monash U (including those from Engineering,Bio-sciences,Business and so on...),they seem very busy all the while with multitudes of lab reports,assignments,test preparations,tutorials and so on!(eventhough Business students all seems so busy!)But look at you(future Civil Engineer),easy peasy life and always saying that wanna study but ended up in front of that stupid LCD playing game.Well,I can't deny that you don't study at all,maybe once a few times I'd seen which last not more than 30 minutes!Now,you call that study?Kiss my ass man!University life wouldn't be easier without putting endless of effort.Honeymoony still think of passing your Uni. life and earn a useless degree cert.Man!You are so naive that I so wanna laugh!Uni.?!You call yourself a Monash Uni. student?Don't ruin Monash's reputation lah!Walao eh!
• What do you think?You are 22 (*sneers and sniggers*)!!!Allow me to laugh please...hahahahahah...!Ok back to the topic again.I am so worry now if you can ever be a Civil Engineer in future.Maybe we can expect more cracked highway's bridge pillars,more of Highland Tower incidents happening...and don't ever think of constructing or build up any world tallest building again.No eyes to see ah!Sami Vellu(aka Semi Value) ,open your eyes wider and see all this well fed future pillars of the country.Your post won't be that easy in future anymore like today.If you are wise enough,step down tomorrow!Mr.Edu. Minister Hishammuddin and other ministers...you all have to suffer from the consequences in future since privileges are all given too your peer ethnic.It's already been so many years of time but you still can't seems to understand the crucial point.It's that your peers just not competitive and productive enough to stand out in the society.They prefer to be a laggard that live in kampung to grant their desire to lead simple life(this ain't any of a reality TV show starring 2 brainless chics!).They are taking things for granted and they prefer quota system instead of meritocracy.Cos they are lazy and they knew that of cos they couldn't make it with other races.Their common race's characteristic is lazy.To give "bonus",they are mean,cruel as well,much more greedy and selfish than my race.Govt. is wasting the taxpayer's money on them.For me,I rather feed a pig better off than wasting $ on them.(shit man!I'm so racism.Hah!C'mon lah,Malaysians are all like me,don't pretend and hide anymore...!)
• Please don't smoke,cos you are polluting the fresh air on earth.Go die alone,don't drag others along.You are wasting the earth resources and wasting the air we breathe...you shouldn't be here to rival for a mouth of air on earth cos with your presence,the earth's oxygen content rates are gonna reduced and wasted.Indirectly,you diminished the oxygen that others can be able to enjoy where those people are simply a better person for sure unlike you do!
• Fuck off!

I hope I won't be writing this kinda morality devaluating/degrading or whatsoever thing in future.Hope you can behave better next time although I think it seems so tough on you.Don't make yourself looks like a fool!Think of your parents,country,own race and most important YOURSELF !

Tell me it isn't real!!!

DAMN!!!

Fucking laid back now but when the guiltiness of having not studying at all when the exam falls on THIS divine Friday strikes me incisively on my head,thank god,I'm awake AGAIN.Yes,this kinda sucky feeling keep bugging me like on and off and off and on...like mood swing man!Jialat lor...tong kim hua hee,eh lei bai tiok see...or maybe this Friday whatsoever!

*Bang head on wall*

KNNCCBHGLTMDDBK...$#^%$#...wtf!!!Tension weiiiiii.....

Do I serioulsy look like someone who's going to sit for a Major-Life-Defining-Future-Deciding exams?

I hate when my roommie pat on me and invites me to play badminton...

I mean,hey,can't u see that I'm struggling for my "semi"-final's?

Well,obviously u noe juz that u think I'm those typical brat spoilt child that don't bother to give a fucking damn to exams at all...*faint*...tell me how should I prove u wrong then???!Is there any obscurity on my current position that left to ur mistaken impression on me???!This kinda feeling really unfathomably irritating and frustating lor...at least for me...I think in this way!

To be honest,I don't even dare to think of resiting even a single paper,let alone the whole AS's papers!

So pls,open ur eyes wider and see thru me,I'm striving so hard to achieve my very goal...

I noe u don't mean anything when u said that I'm "laid back and enjoying"!

But do u noe u really pounced on my vulnerability and invisibly gave me a big tight slap on both my cheeks.It's good to have some stimulus to wake me up from my childishness...so have to thank u for partially contribute to my awakening to this foolishness(how many times I hav to repeat this,enuff of it!)...

I ponder for a while and decided better keep my lappy off my vision or else it'll be a crucial distraction to dampen my will power to study and do revision persistently...

BUCK UP...

I CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE rite?!

Tell me that I can pls!!!

*Pls grant me a good nite sleep oso,so that I can wake up in a total-fresh mode and today-is-a-new-day mood!I dunno y I can't even shut my eyes and throw all the fictitious phantoms out of mind when I started to snuggle my cumfy bolster and blankets...It all happened so naturally thanks to the 2 cuppa nescafe bestowed by the vending machine downstairs.My braincells were very awake and stimulated...-_-

Pls lah!Act like a person which going to sit for exams can?

No more honeymoon-ing and loitering around!

Get back and study now!

YES,IT'S NOW.....!

gambate kudasai and zutto akiramenaide!